1) Bon-Bon: Well, sure! Who doesn’t? Assume too much and you’ll embarrass yourself. Assume too little and you’ll embarrass yourself. We can’t be perfect!

Lyra: Of course, embarrassing yourself and feeling embarrassed are two different things. Things aren’t usually as bad as you think they are.

Bon-Bon: Like many ponies in Equestria, I took a nickname after I got my cutie mark. My birth name is Bonnie Bohun, of Canterlot’s Bohun family. Not the rich side, mine you, but we were well enough off growing up.

2) Have I been asked this before? Sounds familiar… Is this code for something, like that “stairs in your house” thing?

3) B: Of course you want compensation. Heavens forbid you do anything for the greater good without expecting something in return. But you’ll get your payment. I doubt it’ll be as much as you’d like, but Canterlot can only afford to hand out so much under freelancing circumstances.

I’m proud of you though, Strawberry. I know this couldn’t have been an easy decision to make. Thank you for doing this!

4) Depends on how you interpret “personally.” I spoke with dozens; held casual conversations. Had less savory involvements with others. Some of them were every bit the vile, merciless, scourges of society you’d expect. Others could appear normal enough. Sometimes you’d get the feeling that if things had been only a little different they could have been upstanding, charitable citizens. Maybe they even regretted it.

But then you’d see that expression on their face, and all at once death would be too good for them.

1) I think I just didn’t like the battle system, though to be honest it’s been so long I can’t even remember why.

2) Lyra: CC:GG!

Bon-Bon: Ennn… Ponyville is a smaller market. Black licorice is a little too niche. I mean, I could produce some upon order, but it’s not something I’d just stock. I’ve never heard of those jelly beans before. Frankly, it sounds like a pretty terrible idea. But then again I hate buttered popcorn jelly beans and I swear regular variety packs are full of them.

3) Oh certainly! I’ve been working on a pen and paper system of my own on and off for a little while now. Haven’t physically touched it much lately but I’m still rolling around ideas.

Also, if you were wondering why, I still consider that slang to be a swear.

4) B: If the idea is that no one will ever see them again, then there’s no reason not to destroy the copies and the originals, unless you want them intact so that someone can come along for them later. If that someone doesn’t wind up just being you.

B: Alternately, if you turned them in they could be researched, categorized, and stored in a much more secure location. Should the day arise that the contents are ever needed, as authorized by the royal family, they would be intact and easily located amongst the vast, restricted, royal libraries.

1) Bon-Bon: Haha! Well, I don’t know if anypony is eating the stuff, but candy corn is a pretty reliable seller around Nightmare Night.

Lyra: I like candy corn!

2) Well, there isn’t really that much to maintain. I’ve never had to replace anything on any of my lyres other than the strings, and I don’t physically touch them so even then only rarely.

I saw Battle Network being played quite a bit when it first came out. The combat style was completely uninteresting to me. The whole reason I played Network Transmission was because it didn’t play at all like Battle Network.

3) B: How very illegal for you to possess. Also convenient that you’ve no desire to share what you shouldn’t have in the first place. Though I suppose if you were responsible enough to realize that you wouldn’t be attempting to justify it. In vain, if you were wondering.

Strawberry, I thought these were just old spell books. B’s right; that stuff is outlawed and illegal to own. You have to get rid of them. Turn them in, destroy them, whatever you have to do.

4) I’m sorry, but I already know how to bowl! I’m not pro or anything, but I almost got a 150 last time I played. And that was after not playing for a lo~ng time.

1) Oh, I’m far from great; as things could certainly be better. I said I was close to spectacular.

2) B: The public doesn’t really know much about us. To be honest, I haven’t the foggiest what they think. PR had never been a concern in the past. I also wouldn’t call it fair to say we work outside the law.

3) Not that I know of, but ponies don’t talk about it much. I doubt anypony that was ever involved wants to be reminded of it. I certainly don’t.

If you live in Canterlot you’re either rich or you aren’t. I don’t know what hives in 40k were, but lower Canterlot is a notch above a slum. Narrow streets, closely-nit buildings that further obscure the sunlight, alleyways crowded with stuff their owners have no place to store but no pony would care enough to take. It’s pretty safe these days, but it’s never looked as good as upper Canterlot.

4) Sure! Ponies love theater and acting!

5) Not really, because that’s still reading. While it might hold my attention better, I just prefer things that I can directly interact with.

Trying to play the new Neverwinter Online game right now. It’s got some story stuff in it but I still get to smack things and jump around. Really hard to get immersed into the world, though. D&D proper is… pretty intimidating in size.

6) Bon-Bon: All kinds! You should drop by sometime and see what I’ve got! I can do special orders to! Just let me know what you’d like!

Bon-Bon: I’m not the best, but I’ve heard of a Bon-Bon that’s really gifted!

1) Bon-Bon: Infamous? Like… bad? I don’t think so.

2) Afraid? Afraid?! I ain’t scared for [omitted]! But I’ve seen it happening and I-…

I don’t… I don’t know…

3) Ah yes; self-defense applications. Amplification to boost muscle mass and manipulation to shield your body from the adverse effects.

There is a certain level of control required, but you’d start to feel pain if you pushed yourself beyond what you’re capable of. If that’s not a good incentive to stop, it’s hard to maintain a spell when your concentration is compromised.

As for casting it on somepony else, yes it’s possible. And I imagine the results could be fairly gruesome. But amplification spells become weaker the further away they’re projected. Substantially weaker. You’d pretty much have to be touching the subject for about a full second for it to even start taking effect. For that matter, amplification spells would be considered a lot more expensive than most other options. It’s just not terribly efficient.

I’ll get to the lyre part later.

4) Bon-Bon: I’ve seen that one too! I like what he does! Just the act of going around and fixing fraudulent or inept work is fantastic!

Bon-Bon: Hey! Have you heard about this new show that’s starting soon? It’s called Renovation Raiders. They do huge renovations, like the ones that take a few days or more, but they do it in only a few hours while the homeowner is out. I can’t wait!

5) Unless you plan to give copies of those books away, that doesn’t amount to anything. Knowledge you possess doesn’t help anypony else.

And while I’m sure you were only joking, a spell like that would require knowledge of the subject’s presence. B is effectively invisible to scrying, even to seers. You’ve never even met.

B: Well… He’s never been aware of it.

B: Why do I keep getting questions about movies?

Lyra: Just answer the [omitted] thing.

B: … Yes, alright? I’ve seen a few.

Lyra: So what’s your favorite?

B: What?

Lyra: You didn’t always have a stick shoved knee-deep up your butt, so what did you watch? What was your favorite?

B: Ugh, fine. … The Terminal, alright? That’s it. Question ov-

Bon-Bon: What?! The Terminal?

Lyra: I don’t- What is that?

B: Is there a problem?

Bon-Bon: Ponyfeathers. There is no way.

B: I beg your pardon?

Bon-Bon: The Terminal? Tom Hanks?

B: Yes.

Bon-Bon: Ponyfeathers.

B: I like Tom Hanks! Cast Away, Toy Story, Money Pit-

Lyra: I’ve seen those!

Bon-Bon: You are so full of ponyfeathers.

B: [omitted]- Apollo 13!

Bon-Bon: All great movies, but you’re full of ponyfeathers.

B: Why?

Bon-Bon: Prove it.

B: What?

Bon-Bon: Prove it. What did you like about The Terminal.

B: I liked the characters!

Bon-Bon: And I like candy but I can’t have too much before bed. Explain.

B: Viktor was a good character! He travels across the world to get a signature in memorial for his father! He spends months just waiting for the chance, but he’s not willing to sacrifice his ideals or anyone else to do it. He has dedication, but it hasn’t blinded him. A-Amelia is realistic. She has some flaws, but she has a good heart. When she cheated she did so to help Viktor by getting that day pass. The whole love arc between the two is realistic. And in the end it doesn’t work out; there is no forced resolution, because it’s not a love story. The old man who was distrustful at first- and then the scene at the end where he charges the taxiing plane like a soldier marching into battle! The entire movie is about doing what’s right! Dedication to a cause greater than ourselves! It spoke to me! It was an incredible experience!

Bon-Bon: … Wow.

Lyra: Cels, I have never heard you talk like that.

B: … Make me explain myself…

1) That certainly does count for something! My online buddy is pretty good at most games, but she’s sort of a… Well she’s not very nice. Really impatient. Complains a lot. Gets mad a lot.

Edit: Warriors and Lancers can both block, but they both still require timing/rapid counter attack or you’ll eventually run out of resolve. Berserkers are the ones that can block indefinitely. They’re a lot slower, but as long as you’re facing the right direction they can block an attack just as well as lancer/warrior. They wear heavy armor like a lancer. They can be glyphed to regen mana when they successfully block an attack. Their vampiric strike can even let you heal a respectable amount.

They are strictly dps as they have no aggro generation abilities, but in a situation where you can’t spam attacks, like soloing a bam, their fewer but harder-hitting attacks are pretty useful.

2) B: Hm.

Lyra: I’m gonna be honest, Strawberry. Just the way in which you’re describing these things is starting to get really weird.

3) I guess I’d… Well, I mean I’d try to help her. Can’t imagine such a transformation being very comfortable.

Lyra: I don’t know. What are the repercussions of altering the events of a book? I guess I wouldn’t know the answer to that before being thrust into the situation, though…

Bon-Bon: Probably nothing. I mean, I don’t have any special skills for that situation.

Lyra: Then why do you own your own whip and fedora?

Bon-Bon: Oh Lyra… If I was ever going to answer that I would have by now.

B: Assuming I was able to identify anything in this situation, I suppose I would act.

Bon-Bon: Act…?

B: Act.

Lyra: I got it! I would Blue Skidoo back out of the book!

Bon-Bon: W… What?

Lyra: Hey! If Blue Skidoo; we can too!

1) Thanks! It’s okay that this was late, it was nice seeing you at my party in Bearville!

2) Okay.

I hate you. You’re a butt. I should draw a line down your head so it looks like a butt.

3) It was work. Pretty sure the song is just there to spread cheer. Because it’s not fun. It’s work.

4) While I worked as an ambianic musician at the castle I sometimes played during social events with foreign parties present. They would be catered to specially.

I don’t know. There’s something about it that immediately clicked in my head when I bit into it. It didn’t just taste bad, it felt fleshy.

5) Legion? Grouping of military units numbering in five to six thousand ponies, isn’t it? That is a little weird to ban.

Or it would be, if not for that whole Anonymous thing.

6) B: You’ve got all your pieces set up, but you’ve yet to locate your opponent’s.

1) Not very. Hard to swing a bat.

2) B: Any purpose can be made nefarious, if taken to the extreme. We exercise restraint.

3) B: Not at all. Most decline right away, or take it as a joke. And that’s fine.

4) B just sort of shrugged and left. He’s never had a problem with Simple, though.

5) I wouldn’t know.

6) Being insulted is stressful. And stress doesn’t discriminate. It can hurt anyone over anything.

1) Hmm, implications. Would be interesting if GTA turned out to be more than just parts of a whole.

2) I preferred Sonic Adventure over the sequel in just about every way. Cept for Epsilon’s missions. Tails/Eggman’s mechanics from 2 were more refined. And Harbor Metal.

3) Well, what sinister plot could they be advancing? All they do is protect the country.

4) Once again, I’m not following.

5) … I don’t want to.

6) B: As far as anyone is concerned, you’re dead. Forever. Nopony can ever know who you once were. You lose your family; your friends. You have no home; no possessions. You’re on duty 20 hours a day. You can be called at anytime for an emergency. You have years shaved off your life expectancy, with the average being more than just a few.

B: Limitations.

1) Good ol’ George.

2) … What in Luna’s Nightie are you talking about?

3) I didn’t say there wasn’t. You don’t fish for an answer very well, do you? Very opaque, my friend.

4) B: You don’t just become one of us with the clop of a hoof. There is a substantial training period. Things are revealed slowly. A possible promotion. The limitations are thrown upfront to deter those who may decide against joining somewhere down the road. More is revealed as things progress. Few ever decline by the end.

5) Yeah… Got a message with a little more detail than that on the subject… U~gh…

6) Because of your internet. Most ponies that use the ponynet just go directly to your internet. It’s so much less restricted. Why did so many pony blogs sprout up at once? That’s when we were allowed to start interacting with you!

7) Alright. I’d worry, but you’re like, super powerful. Plus you can teleport. I’m sure you’ll be around.

Good luck!

8) I see! Thanks! That explains this too! Sorry for the late reply!

1) B: You think most ponies would choose to sacrifice so much out of a sense of justice? Once your time is finished you never have to work again. You’re taken care of for the rest of your life. As for how we manage with such little down time, I cannot say. I recommend not attempting it yourself.

2) You didn’t ask about the internet; you asked about the ponynet. We use the ponynet to connect to your internet. Once there there’s no way to track exactly what we do on your internet. We could only be traced back to various IP signals from around your world.

The ponynet itself is not a toy. Very few ponies are permitted to deposit information there themselves. Nearly everything there is technical information categorizing our world; hidden behind passwords and other various security measures. It wasn’t some college students’ project, it was created by government employees.

3) The vagueness of your statement gives me pause.

4) Oh! I was sitting here for like 3 minutes. I get it now! Taxes and Taxidermy! That’s funny!

5) We failed. Bon-Bon was gettin’ down, but the hustle is too long and complicated for me!

1) The Power?

If you haven’t figured it out yet, I’m still not following.

2) B: That is their business. I tend to be a little humorless when compared to most, if that helps at all.

3) Not sure what this would be vaguely related to, but it’s already been sent in before.

4) I’LL KILL YOU!

5) I think I stopped just before that mission. I never left the first section of the game. But even if I didn’t stop there, I wouldn’t have remembered that!

6) You have got to be the most violent, volatile society I’ve ever heard of, even in fantasy!

1) B: You seriously underestimate what we’re capable of if you think I need any assistance masking my presence.

2) Not terribly huge on the number 27, sorry. 9 x 3, sure, but what else is it good for?

3) Sorry, classified. If you’re world has taught us one undeniable truth, it’s the value of keeping secrets. You mares just throw everything out there, unsecured, for who knows to see!

4) And I’m sure you’re very proud of yourself.

5) That’s a toy.

6) I’d be delighted! You’re just so cute! I can feel my brain turning to mush and I don’t care!

7) I believe we’ve discussed my feelings on your quack-of-a-doctor once before.