S: “Spell Creation Team”? Why, Equestria hasn’t funded anything that bloated and directionless since-

B: Nevermind. Get on with it.

S: Right then. I’m afraid I will have to request further clarification if I’m to be of any assistance. You see, there are certain methods of home defense that are considered unsafe and excessive. If your residence possessed any such instance… there is little that can be done. If you are worried about the security of the structure, then you may indicate so and I will keep such a message from the public eye.

B: Alternately, I need to know when this happened, who exactly you contacted, and how you contacted them.

S: Alternately? Are you insinuating that one ideology is to be chosen over the-?

B: Just answer the questions and then you can get back to your political whatever.

S: As much a delight as ever, I see.