Answers after the break. Or you could listen to this, which I spent like nine hours on. Most of that in the same day.

1) Oh get over it, dude. You didn’t just have to play two rounds Backgammon with somepony who knows strategies in the game.

I didn’t even know Backgammon could have strategies!

2) It’s not that complicated, guy. One parts only vague knowledge on how reproduction works, two parts “I promise you, you don’t want to know.”

3) Oh yeah. I can’t start the day without that familiar ringing, physical pain to bright light and the urge to vomit coupled with the desire to slam my head against the wall until I lose consciousness.

4) Why isn’t this the first time I’ve ever been asked that?

Why do you ponies keep asking that?

5) Hello there. Evidently my name must be Gullible.

6) Cool it, Hoss. Was all just in April Fools fun.

7) Five percent of everything you own? Stop for a moment and think about how much that is.

Now think about how much it is for extremely rich ponies.

8) I shall take my bow. For once, I feel I earned it.

9) Betta recognize.

10 & 11)