Answers after the break.

1) Sure, whatever.

2) Oh, I know. I’ll get human hands, or maybe I’ll become a lesbian. Or maybe I’ll be forced to sit like a pony! How dreadful!

3) I’ve warned you ponies before. You can insult me all you want, but you’re not insulting somepony else on my page.

4) Applejack? You’re joking right? She’s with that doctor guy. Good luck breaking that up.

But yeah, I know her. We hung out not long ago on her farm. Then I think we went into town together when Twilight started going on about that apocalypse or whatever about her seeing herself from the future.

5) ‘Cause.

6) Something like this maybe? Only with a toothbrush.

7) Or you can separate yourself from the crowd and act like the civilized individual everypony is fully capable of being regardless of age and hormones.

8) Six-… What? No no. A roll of Ritz crackers. Like this.

9) Well, I don’t wake up looking particularly presentable. Takes a lot of work to get my hair looking nice. Have to touch up the make-up I use on my scars everyday. Not because I’m ashamed of them, but who wants to walk down the street and look at that? Used to go to the spa and have them highlight my hair once a month to give it that stark contrast instead of the blend it naturally does. But lately I’ve been doing it at home; much cheaper.

Not terribly long, I don’t guess. But the cost can really add up.