1) B: I don’t watch television.
2) Got something in mind, do you? I’m sure you know the rules by now.
3) Bon-Bon: Well, I offered to chaperone because Liza expressed interest. But she wound up not going. I was still obligated. It was fun though!
Beatbox recorder - Medhat Mamdouh
Edited with additional information provided by
brassmanticore:
His name is Mehdat Mamdouh, he’s a 22-year-old hip hop and dubstep
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Lyra: Come o~n. You said you’d do it. You gotta start it!
B: [Audible sigh] … We.
Lyra: Are the Crys-tal!
Bon-Bon: Are the Crystal!
Tootsie: Gems!
B: We’ll always save the day.
Lyra: We’ll al-ways save the day!
Bon-Bon: We’ll always save the da~y!
Tootsie: And if you think we can’t! We’ll-!
B: Always find a way.
Lyra: Al-ways find a way!
Bon-Bon: Always find a wa~y!
Tootsie: Always find a way!
B: That’s why the people-
B: Of. This. World.
Lyra: O~f thi~s wo~rld!
Bon-Bon: O~f this wo~rld!
B: Believe in. Garnet.
Lyra: Am-y-thyst!
Bon-Bon: And Pear~l!
Tootsie: And Steven!
1) And it’s nice that you’re waiting your turn. Very polite.
2) No? I mean no, right? I mean, I can’t imagine.
3) Not unless Princess Luna intervened every night. I couldn’t ask for that.
4 & 5) Two out of four, actually. Which would be a failing grade. I was late last year too. I’m just so busy right now. I have nothing prepared.
I could still do the tell thing, if anypony wants to ask something.
6) Okay, real talk though? I don’t even like Shrek. The messages it presented may have been innovative at the time for a movie theater animation. But for comics, video games, even regular cartoons, not so much. Memes like “get shrekt” and “it’s ogre” are, to me, less ironic and more mockery. The only reason why they’re even notable is because the franchise has penetrated so deep into modern culture that they’re immediately recognizable.
On the other hoof, I’ve never seen Despicable Me or any related media outside of “He’s so fluffy! I’m gonna die!“ Which just makes me like the kid, not the Servbot wannabes.
1) ‘Bout what?
2) Most of those failures. They can just screw up. And really, those things aren’t complicated. Don’t they print directions on them anyway?
Now, neglecting to teach about things like emergency contraception is a failure in sexual education. The notion that, even if there is a failure in a product you can still avoid childbirth, is about the most important fact you can teach. In an ordinary, healthy relationship, pregnancy should always be a choice.
Of course, we’re just beating around the bush here. The obvious direction this is going in is “This is scare tactics, yeah?“ And yeah, it’s scare tactics. Arm you with just enough information to fear something until you’re older at which point you’ve probably figured it out on your own. Are ponies any better at that? Maybe. But they still neglect to cover emergency contraception.
3) Nope. Everypony poops.
4) Bon-Bon: It was everything I thought it would be! It was like we were one!
Lyra: It was nice to not be alone in a dream. For somepony to watch my back.
5) Since that’s a class 1 felony, no. Also [omitted] ew. Celes.
“Lyra, please talk to me. This isn’t like you.“
Despite the princess’s plea, Lyra’s eyes remained fixed on the floor.
“Are you afraid? I promise, we can protect you. You can stay here!“
When Princess Celestia lifted her hoof to raise Lyra’s head, Lyra jerked away.
“Are they holding something over you? Are you protecting somepony? Please talk to me, Lyra.“
___
“Lyra, please. Silence is not the answer. Aren’t pony’s lives at stake? This can’t get any better if you don’t say something.“
___
“Lyra, I know you’ve been angry with me. But if you can just put that aside…“
___
“Lyra, please say something! Anything!“
___
“Lyra! Lyra!“
___
Lyra could feel the princess’s tears on her shoulder and she clutched at her bedsheet. Though her mouth moved, she couldn’t speak a reply to the nightmares. In the morning, she would find the tears had been her own.
“Lyra, I know you’re being forced into this.” Princess Celestia walked
toward Lyra and placed a wing around her, “Tell me who. Tell me how
they’re getting to you. Are there others? I promise we will find a way
to put a stop to this once and for-.“
Lyra took a step back and pushed the alicorn’s wing away, “Just send me away again. Like you did last time.“
“W-what?“
Princess Celestia, stunned, looked between the guards, searching for an
answer, “Lyra, that was over a year ago. Sunset Shimmer… I had
apologized for-… I’m sorry, Lyra. Please forgive me. But you must-“
Lyra shook her head, “I have nothing to say…“ She never even looked up.
Sorry Garnet and Amethyst, Vidalia is my new favorite character. I’m sure you both understand.
Also, Onion is freakin’ awesome!
“Lyra, what have you done?“ There was a hint of anger in the princess’s tone as she spoke, back turned.
“What
difference does it make?” Lyra pushed herself up and wiped some dirt
off her coat, “All those selfish ponies do is waste it anyway. You know
that money could actually mean something to-“
In a flash, Lyra’s gaze
was met with bright, glowing eyes and a thunderous shout, “TO WHOM DO
YOU SPEAK?!“ Lyra crumpled to the floor in a low bow and shivered. But
before she could reply, Princess Celestia turned her back to the filly,
“Take her. I haven’t the time or the patience.“
Lyra jumped to her
feet as fast as she could, but was already held by two soldiers, “No!
Please your highness!” She struggled against their grip, but was slowly
dragged away. “I’m sorry! Please! Just let me explain! Please!“
“Lyra…“ Princess Celestia stood at a distance in profile from Lyra.
Her eyes were closed and her head was lowered. Her shoulders sagged in
disappointment, “There were many witnesses… They… they said you
stole food. Why? Have you not been provided with enough to eat?“
Lyra
stood up and fought back tears, “There were others your highness!
Living on the streets! I was trying to help them! But I only took a
little! Nopony would miss it!“
The princess grit her teeth, “We are
responsible for our own actions.“ Lyra’s head fell and she too closed
her eyes. “If there are ponies going hungry, then we will do what we
can. But the law is the law. You must not…“
1) Cannot accurately compose sentences either, evidently. Sorry, I’m trying to cut back on my sass, but it does kinda sound like you’re saying that you are… B…? And I’m pretty sure that is not so.
2) From what I understand, if that bit about making God cry isn’t hyperbole, you probably went to a religious school. Either way. In Equestria it’s all taught very dry and technically. This is thing, this is what thing does. It was really, really boring. Though that may have been just me. I kinda already knew the important parts.
3) Caffeine. Whoops.
4) Fifty. Billion. Stretching ourselves a little thin there, aren’t we? I’m just sayin’, there’s only five-hundred twenty-five thousand six hundred minutes in a year.
Wait. I got another one. I’ve heard of speed dating but this is ridiculous!
Okay okay! One more!
“A-gh! Let go of me! Let gooo!“
Lyra flailed against the
armored ponies dragging her down the massive hallway, but to no avail.
If she had the strength to fight back before, it had long since waned.
Two doors, easily ten times Lyra’s size, parted before them and the
light inside blinded her. She felt herself finally released onto the
carpet beneath her. And as her vision returned, a towering figure came
into view.
“Lyra? Are you alright?“ The pearl-white princess
of the sun knelt down to level herself with Lyra. “Please tell me what
happened. I know that what I heard cannot be true.“
Lyra’s forced
herself to her haunches and her eyes darted around the throne room. She
struggled against exhaustion to explain herself, “It… it wasn’t me! I
saw him steal it! I tried to stop him!“
“You tried?“ Princess Celestia drew back to give the filly space.
Lyra’s eyes widen, “I-I did! I did stop
him! I got the pouch back! I was going to return it! But then they
started yelling at me! I got scared and I ran! They were yelling at me!“
The
alicorn princess wrapped her long arm around Lyra and drew her in
close, “Shh… It’s alright, child. If you can tell us what he looked like…“
1) I imagine the first time this was used it probably took a while to compose, what with all the symbols.
2) Twilight doesn’t have any guards. And I’m pretty sure she’s trying to keep this on the down low. I probably shouldn’t even be talking about it. Things just keep happening to change our priorities. That nightmare thing. The Almost War. And Twilight disappeared in Canterlot for almost a week.
3) You don’t sound like a cop. You sound like a robot. Also, the illegal drugs have a name.
4) I’m sure there were those that did. Good gracious, am I this far behind on answering questions? Sorry everypony!
