Ask Lyra

Oh, are you saying you would never want a foal with Boscov? Maybe a cub instead? Plus it's fun to see you mad, since I never did before.

pegasus-cloud-kicker

I was going to post a clip of that old man from Family Colt saying, “I am so tired of you,” but I don’t even care enough to look anymore.

Go pester somepony else.

Wait, you're not capable? THEN WHERE DID LYRA MARK TWO COME FROM?

Anonymous

A different Lyra? I dunno.

How could you remember your good friend Strawberry's past? And how do I remember it better than you do?

Anonymous

It just slipped my mind, was all.

Underage drinking rules!

Anonymous

I disagree.

Do they celebrate snowflake day where you live?

Anonymous

Doesn’t sound familiar.

I’ve been saying that a lot lately.

I keep getting too many messages.

I gotta work on this recording, so no more answers for a while.

So you are saying there is a possibility that you and your lover could have a foal? And you shouldn't get so defensive, it is only a question.

pegasus-cloud-kicker

I’m saying there is no chance in the deepest fathoms of unholy Hell that Boscov and I would ever be able to have a child.

Even if I was capable.

And a question can have every bit of sting as a comment. Don’t try to waltz your way around me with a smile and a nod and think you can say whatever you want.

Hey Lyra, remember that house party you had a while back? It was pretty wacky, huh? With all of the underage drinking, and the drugging, and the foal having to be alone at the ER. Good times, huh? Good times.

Anonymous

Yeah… There’s a reason I haven’t had another one… Can’t imagine how bad one would be now.

Oh, my favorite part was when [omitted] Octavia herself was there for all that.

I’ll be honest, I wanted to crawl under a rock and die.

Sorry i was referring to the second part of that past question that you didn't answer, about the liver, yeah that one. And I'm not stealing from you, Celestia no. That cat pony seems to like you a bit too much, and he would probably [omitted] me up even if I did get away from you

Anonymous

Cat pony?

…

Cat pony…

…

Oh! You mean Strawberry? Ha! I forgot that ever happened!

This might sound a little weird, but is misandry common in Equestria?

Anonymous

Maybe for little fillies. And the inverse would hold true for little colts.

Among adults? I don’t think so.

Now, our society does lean more toward feminine rights above men’s, and that would be a culture shock to a human, I’m sure. But I don’t think there’s many mares that hate stallions.

Of, you know! All this dating could lead to "unnatural" foals and such. Or maybe somepony might think it's a uprising and such. I'm just stating theories, is all.

pegasus-cloud-kicker

Unnat-…

Look here. Without a substantial amount of magic, and I’m talking gene splicing levels of accuracy the likes of which would give even Princess Celestia pause, a bear and a pony cannot have a child.

What anypony thinks about it is less than any of my concern.

So, I heard Rarity was dating a Dragon or something and you are dating a Bear.. Any of that related? A pony could get suspicious, since all this interspecies dating and all.

pegasus-cloud-kicker

Suspicious of what?

*poke*

starcatcherpone-deactivated2017

Quit it.

Just hypothetically, there was this one griffon. You dont need to know the details, it wont concern you.

Anonymous

I think you accidentally part of the question.

Well they could also steal thing while you are asleep/knocked out. Btw you know how much pony liver sells these days?

Anonymous

It could happen. I’m not invincible and I do need sleep. It all depends on who’s willing to do what.

At any given time there is an innocent filly living in this house. On weekdays, there’s two. If you break into my house, your life is in my hooves, and I am willing to take it from you.

As a hypothetical thief, are you willing to kill over less than the down payment for a decent house when you can get twice as much somewhere else without so great a risk?

A dumb thief is easily dispatched, a smart thief would go elsewhere.