As long as you don’t blame me for stealing your heart.

That’s okay, I covered it in glitter.

You still haven’t got it all off your fur.

Wait Am I Allowed To Tell Other Ponies The Specific Details? Because If You Have A Problem With That There’s A Blog I Need To Close Down.

[Snort] [Snort]

[Inhale] I’d ask for a link, but I’m afraid you’d give me one!

So I’m Not Allowed To Imagine You And Boscov Sleeping Together Anymore.

Girl, you’re free to picture whatever you wanna imagine. I’m just saying reflect for a moment before you decide to tell me about it with specific details.

You stole my heart.

You gotta admit, though, it’s a very beautiful heart. Can you blame me?

Answers after the break, because Awesome McAwesome-Socks showed me how to fix the problem!

Keep reading

Alright, so I got a bunch of questions, but since the page break function is still broken I don’t want to flood everypony’s dash with huge updates. Instead, I’m going to answer three questions at a time around every three hours until this backlog is cleared. Unfortunately, I don’t know how to do this automatically, so I gotta do it manually.

Okay? Okay.

1) What’s the cutie mark for having a steady job look like?

2) There’s this elite unicorn division of the guard I wanted to join, but my magically ability just isn’t potent enough.

3) I’m delighted to hear that!

Page break is still broken. Sorry.

1) I’ve answered this before. To add to that, I don’t like this question. It encompass everything I hated the most about my past. Everything from death to ponies who could only wish they’d died.

Further, this is one of those few “legitimate” questions that I hate so much that I’m liable to stop talking to somepony just for asking it.

2)

Maybe I’ll try drawing a picture based on that when I get some time/in a better mood.

And no, that isn’t permission to ask about my day. I want to forget this day ever happened.

3) Is that supposed to mean something?

4) If they have access to human television to actually see the game, maybe.

5) I don’t drink coffee. I prefer soda.

6) Best dog with an unlimited ammunition revolver it can’t use, ever.

7) I’m not always excit- Oooo! I got an email that isn’t spam!

8) Before my time, unfortunately.

9) First time I ever saw him he was possessed by some kind of monster. Scared the poop outta me!

10) Try thinking of backup questions about things ponies wouldn’t normally ask and fall back on those when you’ve got nothing else at your disposal.

I’d give you some examples, but then I’d just get asked about them and that would defeat the purpose.

1) Noted.

2) I’m sorry; I’m lashing out. I was just really hoping the Patriots would have won that game.

3) Yeah… Morals…

1) Sit on the toilet.

Oh, and I read that if you bring your legs up closer to your chest it makes it easier on your bowels. Something about having to do with how animals squat when pooping if there isn’t a toilet around? I dunno.

2) Ha ha. I figured I get some slack for that. Not sure in what dimension baseball is a fast moving sport, but I could see the other two.

Mostly though, I was just trying to incite some kind of response. Everypony, you included, seems to do that to me all the time. Sorry, though. I suppose I overstepped my bounds.

3) It’d be a lot easier if I didn’t make so many mistakes. But thanks!

Edit:

[redacted]yesreainbowdash is a filly!

Yes, she made certain to let me know. Sorry about that!

I’m so out of touch with the real world/athletics/news that I didn’t even realize the Super Bowl was today or who was playing, let alone watching it. But that’s all good to know! Since I couldn’t care less who wins, hope your prediction is right!

1) Become a callous, hateful monster. Care about no one, not even yourself. Become driven by a single desire, like revenge or money. And when the time comes, show no mercy.

Now that you know, avoid it at all costs. It will consume you and you will walk away with nothing.

2) I did not know that, no.

It’s not that hard to think of something interesting to say, is it?

3) And I answered everything because it wasn’t a burden. As it starts to become one, I question if I will continue.

4) Sorry, I looked her up, but I still have no idea who that is. I wasn’t really watching the halftime show.

5) But you’re a guy, aren’t you? Don’t all guys like football? I mean, the only reason I got into it was because of a few colts I would bet against in junior high. Never won any money…

6) Heh, no kidding. It’s nice to see something positive like this.

…

I don’t deserve him, but I can’t let him go.

I didn’t think you were big into sports, or do you just make a special exception for the Super Bowl? Or I’m completely wrong!

1) Pretty sure that’s just a human celebration.

2) I get nothing for almost two weeks, and then I get this? Main character has a giant monster/shadow barreling toward her. What am I supposed to do with this?

3)

4) Despite my joking around when first asked about it, I actually like human Football and understand the game relatively well. Still, I generally only watch the Super Bowl for time reasons.

Let me tell you, I felt bad for the Patriots when they got choked with that safety. The entire first quarter looked like it was setting up for a grim, one-sided game. But did you see that last rush before the halftime? Holy cow!

I think this is gonna be a good one. Going to stand by my previous pick for the Patriots, though.

I didn’t make this, obviously. But it’s an incredible song. This is one way to make a song that’s both a funny parody, and is also awesome on it’s own merits.

I was going to embed a youtube video, but the audio file I’m uploading is a higher quality.

I hope Boscov doesn’t take offense to this either. I know he’s not a fan of Yogi Bear, but a song about him doesn’t mean anypony condones his actions. Sort of like how if somepony likes a song about Bonnie and Clyde, it doesn’t mean they’re endorsing bank robbery.

Anyway, we’re Live at Jellystone!

(Uploading this because I’ll be busy watching the Super Bowl with Boscov.)

Didn’t have a whole lot of time to work on this.

Still, wow!

1) I can’t even wish that anymore. I have responsibilities to the ponies I love.

Even if they let me go, I’d be afraid they’d be gone when I came back.

2) To be honest, I’m a little more interested in the game than the adverts. If anypony recalls, I made a prediction on who would win back when there were still four teams, and one of the ones I picked are playing tonight!

But yes! I’d love to! Think we can do it at Bon-Bon’s house, though? I can’t remember the last time I had homemade ice cream.

3) I don’t read the newspaper. I have an outside source that lets me know if anything particularly interesting is happening.

I heard an anon say that Rainbow Dash had stolen a book series from the library, but I think she just checked them out.

4) Then maybe I won’t anymore.

5) You want to go argue with somepony? Go send your asks to somepony else.

askapple-jack:

((Hey Lyra, guess what I finally finished for you? 

Sorry this took four months to get done. ._.’)) 

Thanks, Applejack! This makes me feel a lot better.

Edit: Isn’t this just super cool?

I’ll try not to take this as a lesson that I should complain more often. Answers after the break, or they will be as soon as I find out why the [omitted] page break isn’t working.

1) Yeah, I did read it. What do you want me to do, berate your opinion? I try not to tell ponies what to think if I can help it.

2) Haven’t started working on anything new music-wise yet. To be honest, I don’t exactly have a lot of motivation for it right now.

In an effort to not invalidate anypony else’s question, I’ll answer the other two parts later.

3) I’ve never played a video game that was so bad I had to stop. I’ve stopped playing because it was boring, and there’s tons of games I never finished because I didn’t have the time, but I tend to know by seeing if a game is any good or not. In this way, I avoid games that are terri-bad.

Final Fantasy Tactics Advance was the worst game I ever played, but I beat that just so no one could say “You didn’t play it long enough” or some-such idiotic argument. In retrospect, that was a horrible idea and I should have just put it down.

And yes, I know of the Angry Video Game Nerd. I don’t find him or That Guy With the Glasses to be entertaining.

4) Bon-Bon’s business is her business. It wouldn’t feel right talking about her. But yeah, we’ve argued a few times about relatively the same thing. I’ll get to that in a minute.

5) We’re supposed to go to a party Pinkie Pie is throwing. But to be honest, I can’t remember which Pinkie Pie is throwing it. Alternate dimensions are confusing.

And unsettling.

6) Twenty-five and three. Not sure why, they were always just nice, round numbers.

7) This is what Bon-Bon and I were arguing about. I don’t know where you got the idea that I was moving along faster than expected, because that never happened. I ran out of ideas for the story I was working on and I’ve been slow to think of any more. I’m trying to shift over to this other project, but it’s hard writing about religion.

I haven’t got much done, and Bon-Bon isn’t pleased. You can force yourself to work, you can force yourself to write if you know what to write about, but you can’t force yourself to come up with an idea.

8) Look around, brony. Everypony is busy. I’m no exception to that. I’m trying to draw more. I’m also trying not to lose my mind.

Maybe I’m just a little stressed out right now. I’m sorry I gave up on the last batch of answers.

9) Played Truth or Dare, threw rocks at walls, play fought with sticks.

Uh… I can’t really think of a PC way to say this, “Talked [omitted].”

Occasionally we’d have a normal game like tag or hide-and-seek.

When I was a little older I sort of stole a Gameboy with a couple of games.

10) I think I’ve lived through enough nightmare scenarios for one lifetime.

I… I can’t even think about it. The short answer is no, I’d probably just die.

1) Oh yeah. These line of jokes never get old.

2) I do not have a copy nor do I know of anypony with a copy.

3 through whatever) Is this all I get anymore? Disregarding my boyfriend and Angel, I haven’t got a decent question all day.