1) I’ve never been formally trained in close quarters combat, so there isn’t much to remember.

2) Roguelikes have never appealed to me. The closest thing I’ve ever played to a roguelike are dungeon crawlers like Azure Dreams, Dark Cloud, or that endless dungeon in Lufia 2.

Oh, and Chocobo Dungeon 2. That was a pretty fun game to play with a friend!

Come to think of it, does Diablo 2 count as a dungeon crawler?

3) Is it the cinnamon swirls in every bite? ‘Cause if it isn’t we’d be up a creek.

4) For the last time, I’m not obsessed with humans! Okay, I talk to them and sort of study them and maybe I think it’d be cool to have retractable fingers or a robotic glove I could remove at will, but not because I’m obsessed!

5) If we’re talking about a theoretical situation, because they’re weaker. If you’re stronger, then you can theoretically hurt those weaker.

If you’re being literal, you’ll have to cite a recent example.

6) Mint! Hey! It’s been a while! How are you? How’s the baby? It’s late but come on in!

7) If you’re weightless, then wouldn’t I inadvertently contort your body, possibly fatally, the moment I move a muscle? You’d just disperse in the wind.

asksirlintalot:

Last time I was this happy, I was face down in a pizza pie, eatin’ my way to freedom! -Brak

(Brak Pone, because Andy Merrill would probably dig it.)

Because Brak.

“Some say he grew a beard and still lives here. But that’s a lie.

That’s a [omitted] lie!”

1) I don’t think you’re understanding. If you come here, you have to leave. You humans don’t belong here.

2) Seems like it doesn’t matter how many times I tell myself that, it doesn’t change anything.

3) I disagree.

4) Uh… I don’t think so. I mean, he might amount to one question on a test about magic history. Might.

5) It was easier to go about my day with you hugging me for five hours back when you were a cat. I think we need to go back to instating time restrictions.

6) Believe it or not, I’ve never heard the full song before.

Sort of trippy.

1) Well I can’t be positive, but I’m pretty sure he isn’t. I’ve been to Star Swirl’s grave site.

“Heed not it’s shape, but march ever toward knowledge, my lamb.”

Very fitting.

2) I’m sorry, I try not to stare at ponies while they’re scratching themselves.

3) Well… I mean not bad or anything. I’m not afraid of him. But sometimes he has this… passionate intensity… I mean you’ve all seen how he acts in public. To have him go from that to… It can be a little intimidating, yes.

But it can be sort of fun! I don’t like scary movies, but I guess like a scary movie? It gets your adrenalin going.

4) Wish I knew what he was saying. Sounds nice.

5) Oh. Well that’s cool. Sure! Maybe we can just hang out for the rest of the day too?

6) It’s not like you can’t resist it. It’s voluntary. It’s just… I wish I could explain it better. From what I’ve been reading, the phenomenon either used to or still exists in your world too. Something about gospel churches? Does that mean anything to you?

It’s not like it happens terribly often anyway. Couple times a month. Sometimes fewer.

7) I suppose that depends on if you retain your form or you become a pony. If you don’t become a pony, first thing to do would be to reach Canterlot and have an emergency meeting with the princess about returning you home. If you do turn into a pony, things be come a lot more complicated.

1) Actually, it does. Thanks.

2) Well, if anypony ever asks, now I can tell them what that would sound like.

3) I am not, no

4) Only in misunderstandings, like I explained in this post. Number nineteen.

I’m trying to build up my self-esteem, [omitted]! Why do I have to keep proving how stupid I am to myself!?

…

I’ve had his headset for like three years and I never realized there was a mute switch on it. Problem solved. I’ll delete everything else to clean up my page.

If you’re reading this after the fact, I’m not a clever pony. Leave it at that.

Edit: Thanks for the help, everypony. I really appreciate that you ponies were willing to help.

You come out from around the corner and call out to get your friends’ attention, inadvertently startling them in the process. Twist goes so far as to scream like a foal and begin shaking in hysterics. Upon realizing it’s you, all three rush over with fanfare and Twist gives you a hug.

They saw you draw the giant away and thank you for it. You in turn thank them for saving you from the electric shadow, to which Amy and Princess point to Twist.

As it turns out, after you were grabbed by that monster Twist had hurled her wooden staff like a javelin and clocked the shadow right in the temple! All right, Twist! Amy had then rushed forward to retrieve you and Princess, as you remember, had ushered you outside.

You thank them all again for rescuing you, especially Twist. You’re suddenly very glad she came along. Who knows what would have happened without her?

1) Get lost before you hurt yourself.

2) Anypony can be either, depends on who you’re talking to and what the subject is.

3) Okay. (Lyra Translation: Okay.)

4) It don’t mean a thing if it ain’t got that swing.

Edit: Count on your hooves how many times you’ve ever heard a trombone sing.

1) Music always depends on mood.

2) Big trains! Little trains! Fast trains! Slo~w trains… Smokin’ trains! Even trains that blow through snow! Plus… somethin’ trains, trolley trains, and much much more! When you order Lots and Lots of Trains!

WOO! WOO~!

3) Are you trying to be logical about a phobia again, anonymous?

4) No.

I knew of her, and she hated me due to a misfired prank. But we didn’t even go to the same school.

5) Alright, that’s enough. I’ve answered this legitimately like ten times and I’m tired of it! It’s terrible, it’s irreversibly damaging, and you [omitted] know it.

Now stop acting like a brain-dead rhesus monkey.

6) And why would that be?

7) Shorthoof for the word ‘gender’ is as much as you’ll get out of me.

8) That sounds familiar too.

Wish my brain worked better.

9) I would. Why?

10) I’m a biological organism.

—

Now if everypony will excuse me, I have something important to do.

Keep reading

You better watch your little gas mask-wearing [omitted], Sturm.

asksnips:

Fairly Odd Crossover

((That has been quite a while in my head.))

Get on my page.

1) Arf arf. Bow-wow.

2) Why no, you can’t.

3) Oh you.

4) I suppose the main difference would be that I can carry him too. For a little while anyway.

5) Absolutely!

6) Look, I’m sorry. I wouldn’t put it past Neightendo to [omitted] something up royally; they did with an entire console. So I never questioned it.

7) Sounds weird. That’s more like the Earthbound I know.

8) Nothing. Not like I can sue for using my likeness. There’s a dozen ponies that look like me.

9) I said enthusiasm, not euphemism. But if you think you feel uncomfortable…

10) I’m tickled pink I found this so easily.

Actually, no. He told me that at the end the world devouring monster-thingy wakes up and everypony dies.

If that’s not what happened, that’s good news. I never even bothered to look into the game because of that.

Well now I feel stupider, but at least I know it was a troll.

I am not a clever pony.

1) I’m the singer in teal! So through a finger in the air and-… Oh… Crud.

2) Nah, I’d pilot Anubis and Boscov would remote-control Gllang. For those that don’t recognize those two mechs, pictures after the break.

3) Yeah! I hear you! That’s amazing! I wish I could go on puppet adventures too! Woo! Force that enthusiasm!

4) That sounds great. Just let me know when!

5) Just in case it is the dark world, here. I think this is supposed to stop you from turning into a pig or somethin’.

6) I have not, no. I was playing Super Smash Bros. Brawl this one time and the pony I was playing with spoiled the ending for me.

Gotta say, not too thrilled. I figured they were above “everypony dies” endings.

Keep reading

Fillies and Gentlecolts, let’s give a round of applause to Puppet Pal Kittysneezes, one of my first askers!

[Clap] [Clap] [Clap]