Ask Lyra

Jan 14

krastosthegluemaker-blog asked: Lyra, do you have any plans for tomorrow night? I was thinking we could spend some time together.

That would be wonderful! Of course!

I like your avatar but a new one wouldn’t hurt I guess.

1) I’ve seen one happen, yes. But I’ve never been in one, no.

It’s not like in the movies; it’s actually pretty scary. Objects and bodies start flying everywhere and there isn’t really a safe place to stand or much time to react once it starts. Bars aren’t exactly wide open spaces, you know.

2) I was looking through my gifts to see if I could fine one, but I couldn’t. They’re all great pictures, but none of them really work for an avatar like I hoped.

The one I was going to use is more of Boscov than of me, and when I zoomed in on it there was too much blank space.

So sorry, no new avatar yet. Maybe one day I’ll get a new gift I can use, but I don’t ever expect those.

1) Is it really? Huh. I had no idea.

Thanks for letting me know! I’ll have something different up soon!

2) Yeah. Main problem with that? Ponies walking on a hardwood floor already make a sharp audible noise similar to a clap.

I guess it could be useful for a pony rave or something.

Waxed on or waxed off, grasshopper?

1) Zero. Like never. Never happened; never gonna happen.

2) You know what? Fine. I give up. I’m writhing on the [omitted] ground right now in extreme pain. You know, ‘cause you kicked me in the [omitted]. Because I evidently have one of those and asterisks mean I did things ha ha!

…

3) You keep offering too late. I already ate again.

I am gonna get me a Klondike Bar, though.

4) Yeah… It sure was a video. Where nothing happened.

The music wasn’t awful. But I couldn’t stop thinking how much better it would sound if they didn’t keep adding in a bunch of unnecessary garbage and distortions.

colorsymphony:

[redacted] around with the highlight tool in photoshop.

More like, being awesome with the highlighting tool. Am I right?

(via colorsymphony-deactivated201202)

everpresentshades-blog asked: TONIGHT ON ONE LYRA TO LIVE: LYRA AND BOSCOV TEACH A GENETICS CLASS FOR ANONS MR AND MRS CAKE GO ON MAURY TO PROVE THE CHILDREN ARE MR CAKE'S, SPIKE COMES ON THE SAME EPISODE AS AN OUT OF CONTROL TEEN, SWEETIE BELLE AND APPLEBLOOM FORM THE RAP GROUP BLOOM MEETS BELLE, SCOOTALOO STARTS A WEST COAST BEEF WITH NOTORIOUS B.O.N.B.O.N, THE GHOST OF MICHAEL CERA INHABITS TWILIGHT, THE PUNISHER MEETS ANGEL BUNNY AND FLUTTERSHY JOINS GWAR!

I wouldn’t wish that on Twilight or anypony.

He always plays the same character in every movie!

Edit: The rest of those sound pretty cool! Good episode!

Anonymous asked: You wind up passing gas all day.

You poor, unfortunate- Nah, I use that too much.

I’ll keep that in mind, thanks for the heads up.

And sorry that happened to you.

1) Yeah. I mean, I guess so.

I was never substituting in a classroom when they were talking about genetics. But we learned about it in Canterlot.

2) Go nuts.

The trash was picked up yesterday.

3) It’s not like you were posting a billion things flooding my dash, or reblogging porn or gore.

I thought about it once, but I decided against it.

4) I’ve never done that before. Are the consequences heinous?

1) She is not! And you’re a horrible little monster for spreading rumors!

2) I didn’t have a reason to stop.

3) I guess they don’t like us together.

4) …

I’d like to just give a joke answer, but I know if I try it’ll just get turned around on me.

5) Of course he was nervous! He’d been up for thirty hours worrying about the possibility of complications!

I assume you’d be surprised to know that most earth ponies have recessive unicorn and/or pegasus genes by this point. Equestria was founded over a thousand years ago!

1) Good morning! Or what’s left of it anyway.

2) Well… I don’t want to tattle on her, but evidently at some point she had placed both of your children under an overturned playpen and even tapped it down. Your son was able to generate enough lift to pick the playpen up off the ground, tape and all.

Also, he accidentally slapped your bath faucet and broke it clean off. Gonna wanna watch out for that right hook.

3) Stupid adverts are getting more evasive everyday.

4) Excuse me?! What are you accusing Mrs. Cake of?!

5) For the love of- [Sigh] Hasn’t somepony already given a genetics course on tumblr? It’s just as reasonable to believe those two foals are in fact his. When one recessive trait comes up, life just has a way of rolling a few more. You may also note that the foals share neither of their parent’s eye colors.

6) Tempting, but I’ll have to decline.

I’ll be sure to watch over Spike from now on. Been shut up in this house too long anyway.

7) No.

Granted it is pretty rude for ponies to constantly bring up and mock you for how you choose to type, but you’re kinda mean.

Foals

I overheard Pinkie talking about her experiences foal-sitting in the market place, so I decided it might be a good idea if I explained a few things that might seem odd.

It’s not strange for a baby pegasus to fly or a baby unicorn to use magic. At that size a pegasus doesn’t have to generate as much lift to get off the ground. As the pegasus grows it will gain weight and in most cases lose that ability for a while until its wings catch up. Likewise, a baby unicorn can inadvertently cast all manner of spells. Yes, there’s even been reported cases of self levitation and phase walking, which are ordinarily very advanced and very difficult spells to maintain. But they’ll also grow into a stage where they lose that ability. I can’t explain exactly how that works, because how a unicorn uses magic isn’t deemed fit as common knowledge for everypony to know.

In short, there’s nothing strange about a foal flying or tossing around objects with magic. It’s uncommon, but not strange.

1) Start your day the indecent way with Molasti-Os.

…

I’m sorry. That was awful.

2) One or the other. I’m not dealing with you both.

Find a way to resolve this.

3) You know, I think it’s less that Sweetie Belle is a dictionary and more that Scootaloo just calls everypony who says something she doesn’t know a dictionary.

Sounds to me like you’re just going to have to take this as one of those life lessons and not drink a bunch of coffee again.

4) You’re welcome to it. Starcatcher will be hanging around for a while too.

5) There isn’t really always room for jello; that was just an add campaign.

And if there isn’t always room for jello, there definitely isn’t always room for fajitas.

Jan 13

theblackstrawberry asked: Lyra, getting better?

It’ll take weeks before my sinuses are back to producing mucus at a normal rate.

Let’s just say for all intended purposes that I’m completely better.

Anonymous asked: So how are things tonight? Want some fajitas?

No, I had baked spaghetti.

Thanks for the offer, though!

Edit: And things are great! Thanks!