Ask Lyra

Apr 17

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1) Probably the two Lyres I got.

2) How do you know Unified Equestrian?

This has been addressed before. Yes, they’re terribly similar when spoken. No, I couldn’t tell you why.

3) I had to do that as a filly before I learned magic. Besides, I’m pretty good at holding things with my hooves.

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4) Fantastic idea. I’ll be sure not to do that.

5) Extra sloppy.

6) Alright, thanks for trying.

Apr 16

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Answers after the break.

Keep reading

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1) Oh, relatively. Sorry, I obviously misunderstood. I found a pretty good hole, though. It’s full of mud. That’ll mask relatively putrid smells right? I’ll just stay here from now on.

2) No, I’m relatively putrid.

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1) I think there’s somepony else that needs a hug a lot more than me right now.

2) Well, I didn’t know they were so completely putrid. Excuse me while I find a hole to crawl into.

3) This reminds me of a clip.

4) Look, sunshine. A prep is the high-brow. Good grades, good home life, pretty, well off financially; could be friends with anypony, but instead is just friends with other preps or jocks with few exceptions.

Having friends, being nice; that’s not preppy. I had a goth friend from elementary to high school and he was nice! Wore demonic accessories, was smart but had terrible grades, hung out with other goths and talked about devils and death n’ [omitted]; but he was a nice stallion!

Everypony deserves friends, but you have to act like a friend would to keep them.

Apr 15

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1) Foals sure do love rhyming inappropriate things. So very mature.

2) Depends on where you are, the style when the bathroom was made or refurnished. Usually things like household income will factor in. Upkeep too.

Maybe you should ask an architect.

3) What are you talking about?

You had an idea for a question. You started writing it out; I follow that far. But past that…

Either way, I’ve never called her Derpy.

4) I think you misunderstood. I don’t care about gardening. I mean, I’ll ask Carrot Top or Apple Jack how their crops are. But that’s because I care about them, not what they yield per se.

But there are unicorn farmers. It’s just… Well, some say direct contact with magic does something to the taste of food. There’s a few unicorns that believe it, but it’s mostly pegasus and earth ponies. I don’t know where to stand on the matter; I’ve never noticed a difference, but I usually levitate food to my mouth.

5) A little. I mean, there’ll be grand festivities, certainly. But it’s not like I know the bride or groom.

6) They travel a lot.

They still see her. They’ll pick her up for a few days in between destinations. They pay for her daily essentials, and the dog too. Nice ponies, but I think they’re having a midlife crisis or something.

7) What have I told you about makin’ stuff up?

Apr 14

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1) Of course I’ve heard about it; who hasn’t?

If you go, though, might want to avoid swearing profusely.

2) Same way babby is formed.

3) Of course, Purple Rain is an excellent track by a very talented artist.

But what kind of heathen isn’t going to give the nod to Jimi? Purple Haze any day of the week.

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1) You know, I’m not sure. I know I don’t need one to just pull my own carriage. But if I were pulling ponies along and charging them, I’d probably need some kind of business license. Or if I was working for a company, I’d probably have to complete some training course to receive a certification.

Anyway, the use of heavy-powered equipment requires a certification. So… I don’t know. The Engineer’s Union?

2) This evening was great. Rest of the day before hand was meh, but you don’t want to hear about that.

Apr 13

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1) ˙ǝɹǝɥ ʍǝu ǝq ʇsnɯ noʎ

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You can check the sidebar of my page for all kinds of information. Specifically:

Here.

And initial here.

I don’t have it properly tagged, but no, I’m not obsessed with fingers. I think detachable hands might be useful, but walking around would be too difficult with hands.

2) I don’t have one; I’ve never heard one.

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1) Well, let’s see. Hmm…

I guess I could write about how my boyfriend’s family was nice, but I kinda figured they would be.

So…

2) Yeah?

3) Fine.

4) I can’t really answer that properly. But your average unicorn should always have a healthy, nutritious diet balanced by exercise. There are physical limitations regarding magic use and the last thing you want to do is become physically exhausted when casting. Partially because you’re limiting yourself, and partially because you might mess something up in your fatigue.

5) I wasn’t raised by nuns. I was raised by maids and stewards until I was old enough for school. After that they just made me food if I was around.

I’m pretty sure they didn’t like me. I was just an added workload.

Apr 12

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1) I wouldn’t.

2) And what relationship guru may I ask is this coming from?

3) ‘Cause fwuffy is wude.

4) Certainly. Magic gets stronger with use just like anything else, to an extent.

General practice when training telekinesis isn’t to lift heavy objects, though. You want to lift and lower multiple small, lighter objects at once. That way you’re training concentration, control, and magical endurance.

And we officially use the Interdimensional System of Units.

5) There are other religions and philosophies on our planet. Not all believe our Princesses to be gods. But without further direction, I don’t know what nuns you’re talking about.

Could you describe when and were you saw them?

6) Right; the primary point of education beyond general basics is to train you in your field of study. As vast as magic is, it can still be pooled together in many areas. On the other hoof, the differences between a blacksmith, a gardener, and a baker are as obvious as night and day.

If it makes you feel any better, anon, I never went to a fancy magic school.

7) I wonder if this will work. Can’t ever tell with those adverts.

8) Do you think maybe that’s your conscience talking? Could it be time for a change maybe? Be nice, help ponies, maybe make some friends?

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1) Just because you say something does not make it so.

2) As somepony who’s been with me since way back may remember, when asked if I’d rather be a pegasus, I replied that I’d rather be an earth pony. It sucks being frail and wimpy; having to rely on magic because you can’t function well enough without it.

I know it’s not as glamorous as weather control or magic, but earth ponies will always be able to yield better crops than anypony else. They can work longer, harder, and labor is always in demand.

Why, if I was an earth pony, I’d have a job right now.

3) There was a brief period of time where I’d walk around the outer edge of the city instead of heading through the lower levels to get to and from school. That was pretty nice.

4) *Empowers you with the ability to ASK A GOOD QUESTION.*

5) You can’t hear it, but I’m resting my hoof against my face right now. With contempt.

6) Do you see?! Read the last three questions and then read this one! Do you see?! All you ponies need to get on the same page with these questions!

7) Around the time I first got on the ponynet and saw that humans exist.

Well… I guess that’s not entirely true.

Apr 11

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1) You can throw whatever kinda fit you want. You’re not in my house.

2) And evidently you’re racist.

Your move, o’ holier-than-thou.

3) I went on hundreds of adventure-type scenarios. Many of them life-threatening. Few by choice.

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Not in the sense you’re thinking of.

Going back to a previous answer, earth ponies and pegasus can use minor enchantments like wards placed on objects. They can’t use anything beyond what would be considered “minor” at the technical level. I’m not permitted to explain why, but it’s a physiological constraint.

Now, they could potentially use a magically-infused object, like what you’re talking about, to power a stronger enchantment, which would drain the object in question making it’s usefulness limited. What they can’t do, is directly drain the magically-infused object to spell-cast.

I repeat, there is no way for an earth or pegasus pony to use magic like a unicorn.

But regarding the magically-infused object? Those are even more closely regulated than enchantments themselves. Chances are, if you find somepony with one or trying to sell one, it’s very illegal.

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1) Rock, Paper, Scissors, Shoot!

Easy.

2) Fwuffy needs to get some mannews.

Anonymous asked: Dude... What if our planet actually rotates around the sun and we've fooled ourselves into believing magic is involved?

Nice try, human, but no pony that doesn’t already know the answer to that would ever think to ask.

Our planet does revolve around our sun, and I heard a long time ago it used to rotate too. But as time went on it slowed down. If nothing was done, eventually it would have tidal locked, like both our and your human Earth’s moon.

What we call the raising and lowering of the sun and moon is really our princess(es) magically grabbing hold of the celestial body in question and using it to flick us into proper rotation. That’s why it doesn’t have to be sustained all day long; it’s just one spell.