1) If I am, my name is either Jill Valentine or Rebecca Chambers since all the other girls in S.T.A.R.S are… Hey wait a minute! They were the only two mares in S.T.A.R.S to begin with!
2) Eh heh heh heh… Moving right along.
3) Well, today was pretty sweet. Boscov took us all to the beach, minus Tootsie who was with her parents. Even brought the dog along. He and Sweetie had a lot of fun together!
Of course, early this week there was the news of Boscov’s family’s restaurant burning down. I went with him to visit his family and everything went alright. Felt a little more comfortable than last time I was there.
4) Interesting position. Obviously out of my control, but interesting. I’ll admit it’s a rather antiquated law; maybe it should be phased out entirely.
5) Two and three, yes. Never got very far in two, but I played three for quite a bit.
6) I’ve never tried.
7) Can I be Baby Commando instead? Way cooler.
8) I looked for him by typing his name into tumblr’s search tag function and according to that, he’s been talking to a couple of homestuck characters.
He was here recently, but left no sign as to where he’s headed next. Hope you find him soon.
1) Thank you!
And that’s a very interesting post you have on your page.
2) That’s not really up to you, now is it? If she decides to break up with you that’s her decision.
Unless you meant like cheating in a game of poker or something. That’s no big deal. You should probably make her a sandwich.
3) That’s funny! You can barely understand what I’m saying and I can barely understand what you’re saying about what I’m saying!
In all seriousness, I play the lyre plenty, but I don’t make much money off of it. I made 10 USD from a commission I did for Mr. Orange. I haven’t made any more money this year from it.
4) This has the potential to be a very bizarre question, but I’m fairly certain you mean the band.
I listened to these two tracks. They’re alright, just not really where my interest lie presently. I’d have probably loved it if I were a younger me.
If this was the question I initially thought it to be, this experimental stuff is really hard to listen to. If you can stand it through, there’s plenty to be gained from studying it. I had a little bit of inspiration just sitting through it once. This one’s a lot easier to listen to, but sort of outside what any musical interpretation I can think of for what the question could have meant.
Speaking of any interpretation.
5) I’m alright. How are you?
Not bad. I’ve heard that style of music plenty of times, but I have to admit I’m having a hard time thinking of a Sci-Fi work that used it.
In fact, the only work I can think of at the moment is Timesplitters. Though really, what does the future sound like? And does it always have to have the same energy? Can it relax? What if it needs even more tension than usual? Does this even sound like the future anymore or is it too upbeat/familiar? And if you want something alien…
Personally, I’ll always favor retro Sci-Fi for my futuristic. What could possibly be more futuristic than a style of music that will never be popular in the present?
And while I was searching for music before settling on Timesplitter tracks, I stumbled upon this one track from Parasite Eve that was only available on the music CD. Only slightly related, but it’s pretty rad! I wish I could sing like that.
1) Hm. You’re alright, Anon.
2) You’re all really great and super cool, but I might embellish a little bit to make you sound better than you really are.
3) Nope. Just sounds like an out of context quote. Which happens a lot around here.
4) Eight. I have ate eight breads.
5) I’d rather you didn’t and will take steps to avoid that.
6) Thanks! I guess that’s four things.
7) You have got to be kidding me.
1) Music, video games, and knowledge of magic!
Was that quick enough? Was hard to think of anything off the top-of-my-head.
2) Eighteen minutes!? What am I? Made of time?
U~gh… Alright fine. I’ll watch it after I post this.
3) I wouldn’t know the difference between the two. And a pretty large relief since she appears to be an idiot. Equestria would be doomed if it wasn’t run by somepony competent and self-sacrificial.
4) Of course! Also this cover I did.
5) Never played it, sorry. Not bad. The second track is much more interesting than the first, though.
6) Uh… No. Well… Sort of. But more subtle. For the most part, a great magic potential isn’t about how fast you grow, but how high you can reach.
7) I do not, no. Never really saw the need. If there’s something that should be added, it’s the site’s duty to add it themselves. If a third party comes in and fixes things on their own, it’s ignoring the underlying problem that the base software possesses which caused the need for the third party to take action.
If there’s a great problem with this site that remains unsolved, then eventually another site will come up and take its place.
8) While it’s true that magic has no limitations, our grasp of magic does. Magic can do anything, we just don’t know how. Research continues to this day and likely will continue for all of time.
9) They’re okay. I prefer dogs.
10) Being that I only got back with Boscov a few hours ago, I don’t think that happened.
11) Sorry, can’t help you there. Couldn’t ever get enough hang-time.
12) It was mostly a train ride home after spending the previous day with Boscov’s family. There was a lot of old stories about the restaurant being told yesterday and before we left. I couldn’t really catch many details, but I’m sure Boscov could tell a few if he’s feeling up to it.
After doing your business, you get up and flush the toilet. You sort of hobble a little to get used to the pain in your hoof, then try walking a little more regularly. Looking around the bathroom reveals neither a fountain nor a box of any kind. There isn’t even a mirror, though you can tell where one used to hang. However, something seems out of place.
You signal to the girls to keep quiet and slink about the bathroom. At the far end, furthest from the door, you can hear a faint noise. It almost sounds like gas escaping, or a snake hissing.
1) You’re welcome.
2) I say groovy! I say groovy all the time!
3) Look, I’m kind of in a hurry to get ready here so I can go with Boscov to visit his mourning family. So why don’t you go harass somepony else? I’m busy and I don’t need your [omitted] right now.
1)
2) Well this certainly couldn’t have come at a better time. Excuse me while I go cry.
3) That’s silly. You’re silly.
4) That’s… interesting.
5) Thank you, friend.
6) Thank you very much! I like your tail!
7) Ash? From Phantom Brave? Hold on! Hold on! Let me see if I can find Marona’s! … Here we go! “Valiant phantoms, aid me in battle! Chartreuse Ga~le!” Ha ha! I used to think that was awesome! Ah… Fast forward and it never quite held the same weight as Lenneth’s “Come to me dark warriors, battle awaits us!” from Valkyrie Profile.
8) Wasn’t in Ponyville this year so it was just a small… Uh…
… I have no idea… I slept in. It really wasn’t in Ponyville this year, though.
9) Unless his genetic makeup was altered, that’s not shapeshifting, that’s transforming. Shapeshifting is a biological trait. But I see what you’re getting at.
I never hold anything against an individual unless they prove it warranted. But when it comes to a group, any collection of creatures be it based on species or ideology, I have to make split-second decisions based on generalizations. That’s one of those sometimes unfortunate reasons I’m still alive.
10) Probably dozens more, but I’m no biologist.
11) She seems pretty unhinged.
12) Huh. I always thought those things were volunteer. But congratulations!
Cutie marks are usually seen in a negative view by non-pony cultures. Not in a “Kill the pony because there’s a magical tattoo on them” type of negative, but more of a “Haha, they have to find out what their career choice is through a butt mark.”
1) I’ll try and keep that in mind.
2) Oh hey, it’s that guy that isn’t funny.
No, can’t say I do.
3) ‘Cause the world is black and white, right? It’s just one extreme or the other, right?
4) Look, brony, I’m sorry. I didn’t know what you were talking about so I stuck it into google and what I came up with wasn’t exactly foal-friendly. I didn’t think it out of the ordinary considering how often that happens with the asks I get. Truth be told, I’ve never seen any Macross series. I’ve only ever seen Robotech, and even then only like the first ten-fifteen episodes. I liked it, but I couldn’t find them anywhere.
Considering how much you’re blowing this out of proportion, I still think this was all a setup. But if it wasn’t, I’m sorry.
5) … To be honest a twelfth sounds a little generous.
I don’t really know what to tell you, Boscov. The only ponies that would know more about me than you were ones that were around me when I was little. And that’s pretty much just Princess Celestia.
6) Totes gotta be the bed, Tote! Beds are the best furniture!
7) I figured it was a biological question, though I suppose he may have meant that too.
1) Sounds good to me. You let me borrow your Sam’s Club card and pay for my arcade games and I’ll give you my tickets all times/every times.
2) Bon-Bon? Dark and mysterious?
And what do you mean fresh?
3) Is it me or is rap music just getting Family Guy reference.
Lot of lines I only barely remember flooding my memories of the game. Had to look this up again. One day, I’m gonna find a way to play this myself. I must.
4) Because I’m obsessed with humans and hands, right?
And it never gets old, does it?
5) I don’t think it would matter, would it? Not like he’d jump dimensions to deliver presents to-… Did you say Santa Christ?
6) I’m just saying, you know, you could probably think of something better.
7) You know, that’s a good question.
I have no idea what the answer is, but a good question none-the-less! Great job!
8) Okay.
9) Sorry, we can’t talk about this anymore.
10) You heard Anon #7 (Question 8). Pack it up; argument’s over.
Hmm… Does Saturday sound good?
1) Fight fascists with humor or defender of our constitutional right to deprive poor people? That’s all I got from Google. Yahoof couldn’t find anything.
2) I’ll let you know if you suddenly become funny, and…
3) I’ll let you know if you suddenly become funny.
4) Hit Anon?! Oh praise Celestia! A rational anonymous! What’s that? A date related to an unsolved murder case of unmatched notoriety in the human world? I’ll take it.
5) No, I think they use helium. I’ve never been on one; very expensive.
6) That’s not even the argument!
7) You’re right, my mistake. When you finally get to safety after being attacked by a single lion, you’re safe.
Not getting the point? How about my human friend Ron helps you get this one (Language Warning if you listen for too long)?
8) I’ll be honest, brony, I don’t think that exists as a “joke” in human Earth either.
9) Saturday, Friday, Thursday, tomorrow. Right now until Saturday when hopefully this obnoxious-[omitted] line of questioning will have ended. You know, whenever.
You quietly turn around, back up toward the urinal, rear up, and kick the piece of crap as hard as you can! Unfortunately, or fortunately as you would later find out, the urinal is made of a harder stone than you realized and does not shatter. Instead, an intense pain flares up from your right hoof and you fall to the floor screaming in agony and frustration. Your friends quickly enter, confused, and Twist shoves a hoof into your mouth to muffle the noise. At this point your eyes well up with tears and you start to feel pretty stupid about what you just did.
For the second time now you’ve accidentally hurt yourself, this time a little more seriously than a simple nose bleed. Your damaged hoof is going to noticeably slow you down until it heals, which probably won’t happen until after this little adventure is over. If you don’t start being more careful, you’re going to wind up killing yourself without the aid of any dangerous shadows or whatever else might be lurking about.
Once the pain subsides enough that Twist can retrieve her hoof from your mouth, you reluctantly explain what you did, to which Princess throws her hooves up and walks back out of the bathroom in apparent frustration. Twist and Amy help lift you up, walk you over to a stall, and sit you down before backing away and out of sight. They’re still in the bathroom with you, just off to the side.
You noticed something out of place when you were sat down and look down into the toilet bowl to investigate. Strange though it may be, there’s water in the bowl. You relay this information and ask somepony to flush a toilet, which they do, and in turn tell you that the toilet seems to be fully functional. They also check the faucet at the sink. While water does flow from it, it looks and smells pretty bad. There’s no way it’s drinkable. If that urinal had broken when you kicked it, you’d have been showered in foulness the likes of which no pony should ever have to live through.
Either way, this building has running water.
1) Not too often. Don’t want to get any leaves or dirt in my mane.
2) Nope.
3) I don’t know that there are any. More specifically, I don’t think there’s any Equestrian law protecting online privacy.
4) Why wouldn’t it?
8) I think Bon-Bon would do better with the lower body while I handle the torso and Bos- I mean Krastos takes the head.
9) There would likely be a problem if the website was hosted in Equestria, and the photographer could probably be prosecuted if caught. But there’s really not much we can do with a website hosted in another dimension.
10) Sounds good to me! What day did you have in mind?
11) Like I didn’t see this coming.
I reserve the right to censer for both language and the content that language implies. This is also known as “It’s my page; it’s my decision.”
12) Oh… I Uh… I got nothin’. If there really is, you’ve called my bluff.
13) Certainly!
Answers to 5, 6, and 7 are after the break.
1) Sort of. Mostly just walks around town or a park. Sucks not having any money.
2) I don’t. I found them on the ponynet while trying to find a reaction image for “pony i can’t handle these feels,” which lead me to try “pony nom nom nom”. The real question is why this page exists.
3) Which is interesting, because I’ve never actually done that before. Funny name, though! Didn’t know it had one.
4) I couldn’t read everything on the picture you sent because it was too small, but I got the general idea from that and the video you linked. Considering he evidently must have psychic reflexes, probably not, no.
5) Thanks for the offer! That was really cool! I probably won’t be going, though. I’d rather just hang out with my boyfriend when he isn’t working, trot around Ponyville, keep looking for a steady job. You know. But thanks for thinking of me, alternate me!
6) Are there land and sea equivalents of the Blue Angels in your world?
7) Oh give me a break. You were incarcerated for a month. This isn’t Shawshank and you aren’t Brooks.
8)
9) I got Majestic-12 out of that anyway.
