Hmm I don’t remember saying anything bad but I also can’t remember what the redacted word was, haha. In other news, your government sounds scarily like ours.
1) That’s nice, dear. Now go play.
2) You’re absolutely right. Let me go use my lyre playing talent to go advance irrigation technology.
3) If I get into a fight with a dragon, I’m gonna lose. I can at least try to fight it; I might even get lucky and escape. But you can’t win against aging. Ever.
4) Well would you look at that.
5) I’d be devastated. If he ever did, I’d rather never find out.
6) No, because being a prick is subjective. The concept of evil is supposed to be cosmically defined.
7) I don’t recall getting “a very nice ask” in quite some time.
8) For the most part, it works fine for us. Massive societies work best when governed on individual district levels. The only reason there’s any issue is because changing laws regarding non-pony marriage falls under immigration/integration, which in a nation with open borders can only be regulated at the national level. And a law regarding name changing is a matter of security, which is also a national concern. We don’t have things like facial recognition software, so names are important for identification.
Changing either law, with proper process, wouldn’t cause any problems. It’s just that the kind of laws they are require national legislation. And that means the ponies with the money/influence can toss their weight around to sway others away from change that may have unforeseen side-effects.
Keep Gaming, Baby! (or perhaps [redacted] since I don’t really like calling grown mares baby) Krastos “Gluemaker” Bear?
1) This is why you really need to explain exactly what you mean in the ask you send. I do these in the order I get them and there are nineteen waiting after this set of eight.
2) I’ll keep your concerns in mind.
3) REGURGITATION, ASSOCIATION, OR MISDIRECTION OF PONYNET REFERENCE GOES HERE.
4) While she does have that power, Princess Celestia is wise enough to not wantonly indulge everypony’s fancy. She only acts directly upon matters of grave importance and otherwise lets us govern ourselves. On the other hoof, the average pony just doesn’t care and the upper-crust actively oppose anything that doesn’t benefit themselves.
6) Familiar with the name. Never read it.
7) The old mare’s tale? It was an all-consuming creature of toxic corruption. Even if it is real, why would you take the risk worshiping it?
8) “Gluemaker” Bear! Of course! I knew there had to be a way to fit him in there! I got hung up on his last name, Arctos.
1) Possibly. Smooth Criminal might have had a similar affect.
2) Kids Gone Bad? Kick Gum Back? Kiss Green Bats?
3) I have no idea. Not something I make a calculated effort to discover.
4) Wasn’t that the thing I wasn’t supposed to answer for some reason? I can’t remember.
5) We are young. Heartache to heartache we stand.
… Shoot, already used that one.
6) Vega…?
…
Vega…
7) Oh. It’s an old post that I only just tagged, but my meta powers weren’t always around. They aren’t going to know anything from a time before they existed.
1) Probably getting my cutie mark.
2) What? Can’t I be both?
4) Why are you yelling?
5) Lowered expectations altering perspective so that it appears that I’m succeeding.
6) That’s not really something nice so much as something neutral.
7) Why wouldn’t it be serious?
1) You’re insensitive to others. That doesn’t make you evil; it makes you a prick.
2) Why should I have to do anything? In fact, if I went out of my way to trust you, it’s a lot easier to not trust you.
3) You are mistaken.
4) I never asked to be sent more messages than I can answer in a day without spamming my follower’s dashboards. But for the sake of argument, am I sure about what?
5) No, he isn’t. Because it’s not another dimension. It’s not an alternate reality. It’s not anything. Just some human drawing pictures.
6) Where else would he carry it?
7) You can either pop a Mana Pot, down an Ether, or hit a few blues.
If we’re being serious, in dire need a unicorn can drain a magically-infused object to rapidly recuperate. It’s slightly dangerous, but no more so than most things.
1) Oh [omitted] me sideways…
2) Obviously, why wouldn’t it be literally?
3) Certainly. Everypony loves a moist bed.
4) Of course. After all, Wumbology is the study of wumbo. And everypony loves Wumboween.
5) Sorta like Foxbat style.
6) Woah. This is going a little too fast. It’s not you; it’s me.
7) Oh, you’re leaving? So soon?
8) As has been mentioned plenty of times, ponies will eat unfertilized eggs, usually in cakes.
1) You caught me. I’m not really a pony. I’m actually a pygmy elephant.
2) You know what? Yeah. I’m a virgin. I believe that wraps up your one-track line of questioning.
3) How half baked of you to say. This and the previous answer are brought to you by the National Foundation for the Advancement of- You’re Trying Too Hard.
4) I wish I made A’s back in school. Thanks though!
5) I’m not commenting on this unfounded accusation.
[video]
1) Salu~t! How are you?
2) Step 1: Enter bathroom. Step 2: Use bathroom. Step 3: Exit bathroom.
3) I don’t know; I’ve never boxed professionally. I don’t want to get my face torn up. But compared to a human I’ve got a very short reach, so I’d probably never get a single hit in on either.
4) A~nd end scene!
5) I… I mean, that’s not how it… Or… Maybe?
…
What would I ask?
6) Told you I could be scary! In your face, anon who insisted I couldn’t!
I wish I’d listened… Nothing like seeing a sick artist’s depiction of your own brutal murder.
As for you. I knew better than to click that link, but when I saw the mail address- I trusted you. You betrayed that trust. I hope you’re satisfied.
1) Pretty sure you’ve sent this before. Still don’t get it.
3) Growing old scares me.
4) Solomon?
5) Well, I do like ice cream and pizza. And it’ll just gonna go to waste once they’re stopped.
Hmm…
6) Thank you, Hit Anon! Now hurry! There are more dates to be saved!
1) Don’t project yourself onto me.
2) Equestria. Ah-quest-tree-ah.
3) Huh. I wasn’t aware the Griffon Kingdom was an actual, you know, monarchy. I thought it was just an autocracy. Alternate dimension or maybe I was just misinformed.
Be nice, be considerate of pony customs, and have patience. Patience and courtesy will win over individuals and unless you’re running for office, that’s all you ever really need.
4) Can’t even remember the date of something that happened this year… I’d say it’s a wonder I can remember my own birthday, but well…
5) Alright, there’s a button on the top left corner of my tumblr page, if you’re really so invested.
6) Will do, though I think she got the message earlier.
7) …
1) No offense, but that is seriously as bad of an intro as Regular Show. Nothing happens! I like the chord progression, though. Could use some more bass.
2) Absolutely! I haven’t sat down and listened to all of the tracks they’ve done, but my favorite’s still Light Up The Night. In fact, that’s one of my favorite songs!
In particular, I like the ambiguity of the lyrics. Makes it much more legitimate than somepony singing about Mario fighting Bowser.
3) Who thought you were dead? I didn’t even know you existed. And what about “our” mom? Is Green Angel supposed to be my real name? Are you Racer X?
4) But why is that?
5) How about a roast?
6) I’d believe it. But if she did manipulate events, she did it for a reason. She always does.
1) Well that’s good!
2) Uh… Nothing? It’s twice as big as I am. I doubt I could even lift it with my mouth.
3) No, which I’ve answered before.
4) You have a good night yourself!
5) I’ll let you know if that ever works.
6) Gato…?
7) Added to the grocery list, thanks!
8) Well aren’t you clever…?
If I said “yes,” would you be satisfied with that answer?
Bonus: Submission that was too long for me to post regularly, considering how far behind I already am!
1) I prefer digital over analog.
Did I do that joke already?
2) Well, that was quite some time ago. I was sad when it happened; I think everypony was. It does happen, though. I miss that gif of Applebloom saying “Scootaloo~!”
3) I’m sorry. I’m not sure what that date is for. Dates are one of the big reasons I’m bad at history.
4) Oh no. Not this time.
5) I don’t drink coffee regularly. And I like my males lively, interesting, and independent. By the way, and you’ve probably realized this by now, but that joke doesn’t work very well for ponies.
6) Are you going to help me pay for them?
Then does it concern you?
Didn’t think so.
7) Not offensive, no. Just kinda silly. And that cat looks like it wants to kill ponies that weren’t even involved in it’s current situation.