Ask Lyra

Had a dream, short one as far as I can remember, where Bon-Bon told me she joined a band. And I’m all “Oh my gosh! That’s great!“ And she was trying to show me the kind of music they’d be playing and I’m figuring something slower and spiritual with, like, personal stories tied to them. Folk/Bluegrass-paced at the very most. And then she brings up a window playing this song and I’m just losing it.

“Bon-Bon-hahaha-what?“
“What’s wrong, Lyra?“
“HA-hahahahaha!“
“You don’t like this song?“
“No!-Hahaha-It’s fine!-Hahahahaha! W-… What instrument do you play?“
“I’m the singer.“
“HAHA~! AH hahahahaha!“

Lyra: That griffin was incredible! I bet if she was pitching too they’d have had to enact mercy rules!

Bon-Bon: She was something else, alright! I’m glad Golden Harvest invited us.

Lyra: I’m glad she invited you to join her Buckball team! Raindrops and I might be trash, but you really do deserve that spot.

Bon-Bon: I’m not sure how often I’ll be needed, but I’ll stay in practice for sure. [Pause] And I’m proud of you, Lyra.

Lyra: Me?

Bon-Bon: That score you made against GH’s team. I didn’t want it to come off the wrong way; like I wouldn’t have been proud if you hadn’t caught any goals. But that you worked so hard and improved so much. You tried Lyra. I’m so proud of you for trying.

Lyra: I only give up on something if I feel it’s a waste. But since it was to help you, I knew it wasn’t.

Bon-Bon: Aww! Lyra, that’s so- Wait a minute. You gave up on cooking.

Lyra: Ah… Uh….

Bon-Bon: Cooking is not a waste, Lyra!
Lyra: Gee, is the sun setting already? I still have a few errands I need to run!
Bon-Bon: Cooking is an art form! A discipline! It’s an essential life skill!
Lyra: I’ll catch you later, Bon-Bon! Don’t wait up!
Bon-Bon: Lyra! LYRA! I CAN RUN FASTER THAN YOU!

Lyra: Are you alright, Bon-Bon? What’s wrong?

Bon-Bon: Minuette is stuck in Canterlot, some issue with the trains. Vinyl can’t leave Manehatten. And while we have Raindrops here to fill in for Blossomforth after she sprained her wing- we have no unicorn!

Golden Harvest: Oh no! I’m so sorry, Bon-Bon! Should we reschedule again?

Bon-Bon: No… I’ve already held your team up. I don’t want to make you three have to keep pushing matches back because of me.

Golden Harvest: What if we let you borrow a player?

Bon-Bon: It wouldn’t be the same… Besides, we practiced plays and maneuvers-
Golden Harvest: I understand, Bon-Bon.

Lyra: [Sigh] I’ll do it.

Bon-Bon: I appreciate that, Lyra, but-
Lyra: I know the game, I know the team’s strategies. I know I’m terrible and I know there’s no way we’ll win. But I also know you love playing this game. And the only reason I ever agreed to play is because I saw how excited you were. I wanted to help you do what you love. Now, would you rather try as hard as you can and still lose or lose by default?

Bon-Bon: You know what, GH? We’ll at least give your team some real practice before you take this show on the road!

Golden Harvest: I’ll let the girls know, but we won’t go easy on you!

Bon-Bon: You’d better not! [Pause] Thanks, Lyra.

Lyra: Of course. Ready to lose, Raindrops?
Raindrops: Heehee! Wouldn’t be the first time, won’t be the last!

Bon-Bon: That was good practice! I feel great!
Lyra: Uh huh…

Bon-Bon: I feel prepared for my first game tomorrow!
Lyra: Good for you…

Bon-Bon: Speaking of which… you’re… off the team.

Lyra: … Fine…

Bon-Bon: I mean, you never wanted to play anyway, right?

Lyra: Not want to play sports? Me? Whatever gave you that idea? I love getting hit in the face with a dodgeball, tripping over a basket and falling in the mud every fifteen minutes. Nevermind all the sighing and shaking heads everypony else-
Bon-Bon: Alright, I get it. Sorry I even asked you to play.

Lyra: … So, who is replacing me?

Bon-Bon: Minuette.
Lyra: Minuette? She barely had time to practice. What happened to Pon3?

Bon-Bon: Her schedule is just too unstable. One minute she’s fine and the next she’s booked for a week. She’s fine as a reserve, but we can’t depend on her.

Lyra: So you, Blossomforth, and Minuette vs. Golden Harvest, Amethyst Star, and…?
Bon-Bon: Muffins, unfortunately. Turns out she’s a natural when she’s not hamstringed as an earth pony. Bad call on my part for letting her go.

Lyra: Well good luck to you. I’m gonna go pass out on the floor, because I’m too dirty to climb into bed.

Bon-Bon: Lyra! Blossomforth is all over you! Move!

Lyra: [Panting] Blossomforth… Can SEE DEEZ NUTS!

Blossomforth: Ugh! Rude!
Bon-Bon: Blossomforth can’t see anything if she’s standing on them. Come on! It doesn’t matter how much I have the ball if you give me nothing to work with!

Raindrops: I think you’re doing great, Lyra!

Lyra: … Thanks, Raindrops.

Octavia: Good evening, Vinyl. You look well-rested, which I would consider to be odd given we stand upon a sports field. I take it practice is a little one-sided?

Lyra: H-hey Octavia!

Octavia: Good evening, Lyra. Bonnie.
Bon-Bon: Octavia.

Octavia: Now Vinyl, you’ll recall that patron in Manehattan that canceled on you? … Well, they uncanceled. I came to see you as a formality, thinking you’d be too exhausted to perform. However-

Bon-Bon: It’s alright, Vinyl, you go ahead. I don’t think you’ll be getting much practice like this anyway. You and Raindrops can go too, Muffins. And thanks for filling in for our earth pony today!

Muffins: Sure! Happy to help! Although I’m not really sure I did anything…?

Bon-Bon: We’ll keep practicing, if you’re up to it Blossomforth.

Blossomforth: You bet!

Raindrops: I’ll just stick around and cheer everypony on then! Hehe, I don’t really have anything else to do.

Bon-Bon: Alright, Lyra. Get up.

Lyra: … Like I haven’t got embarrassed enough today…

Lyra: That as pretty fun! And Snails was amazing! He looked like a professional out there!

Bon-Bon: He certainly did. I had no idea he was so gifted.

Lyra: I wonder if that game will become more popular.

Bon-Bon: Maybe. Buckball looks like a fun game, but…

Lyra: But what?

Bon-Bon: Why were the unicorns just standing there? It made it far too easy for the pegasus to block. Appleloosa’s pegasus was terrible. The only reason she blocked as many shots as she did was through physical presence. That’s not very athletic.

Lyra: It was probably in the rules. A moving goalpost is already pretty intense.

Bon-Bon: I wonder if I couldn’t change a few rules to make it better…

Lyra: Why does that sound sinister?