Ask Lyra
Month
1) There were about a hundred different ways I could have replied to this. But, while trying to decide which one, I realized that… you’re sort of right? Which is more than a little depressing.
2) Bon-Bon: No! No coffee! Water!
3) Bon-Bon: No! No excuses! No massages! Water!
Lyra: What about hugs and candy?
Bon-Bon: We’ll talk.
4) It happened once about a week ago, but other than that I hadn’t had a cramp like that since I was little. I was kind of malnourished back then.
But no, it was just in my leg.
1) Answering asks. Also listening to a song.
2) You definitely would be.
3) That’s cheating! You’ve been cheating for years! Dirty little lawbreaker! Dirty little lawbreaker!
4) I don’t know what you’re talking about. That wasn’t in reference to a Sega game that actually had some interesting concepts but was poorly executed on all fronts.
5) Lyra: In all seriousness, developers aren’t perfect. Sometimes there isn’t an effective counter, or if there is it’s too specialized. Going back to Pokemon, that was the whole reason for the massive changes from Gen 1 to Gen 2. Psychic was broken as all get-out and there was no effective counter.
Lyra: But yeah! Hug a dragon! Hug a swearing dragon!
Bon-Bon: Not lately. Maybe you should remind me.
6) Interesting song. More popular song, but not as interesting.
7) Well, it was quite some time ago.
8) I know what you were referencing, I’m just not sure why given the context.
9) Thanks! It was a tough pose but I pulled it off!
Bon-Bon: I warned you about this. I’ve been warning you about this for years, but especially here lately.
Lyra: Just shut up and help me into bed!
Bon-Bon: Too much soda. Too much wine. Too much salt. And here lately way too much soda. You need water, Lyra!
Lyra: It hurts so much. I haven’t had a cramp like this since I was a foal.
Bon-Bon: Probably for the same reason then as now. If you need to drink a soda at work to stay awake, with your haywire schedule, I understand. But you have to cut back somewhere!
Lyra: I know. Just… help me into bed. I need to rest. I really don’t want to have to cancel work tomorrow.
It’s a cool place, and they say it gets harder
You’re bundled up now, wait ‘til you get better
This is awesome.
1) 19/2000? 3’s and 7’s? 25 or 6 to 4?
2) I played the first two- that is Katamari Damacy and We Love Katamari. Fantastic game. And I own both soundtracks! Everlasting Love is my favorite! But that’s probably because Lonely Rolling Star was my favorite from the first game. But really EVERY SONG is FANTASTIC (Cherry Tree Time’s possibly excluded)! Of course, I can only speak for the first two games because that’s all I’ve played and all I’ve heard. And of the two, the original’s soundtrack tends to be the strongest overall.
As for The Prince regarding our previous subject, I’ve been saying he should be playable in the next Smash Bros. since Katamari Damacy first came out (between Melee and Brawl). His size and quirky nature would make him a unique addition! Plus, the cousins would function perfectly as alternate color schemes! Kinoko’s my favorite.
3) Nope. Holiday’s excluded, you gotta pick one per visit.
4) Forever disappointed Grave Digger wasn’t mentioned. They’ve been around for over thirty years, released sixteen studio albums, and they’re still going! Their latest album (which I haven’t heard yet) came out just last month!
Still, a fantastic walk through the various genres- and of course I was interested! I love metal!
Favorite song check! Have I really never listed Excalibur? This song in particular, aside from being from my favorite band, holds the distinction of having my favorite solo!
1) Even if I started this tumblr obsessed with hands, don’t you think messages like this would have gotten old after THREE YEARS?!
2) I already did that. You can find it here!
3) Hmm. That would have been interesting!
4) Those dragons are a joke. All you have to do is get in their face and walk around their aimless stomping. But yeah, when I first ran into them they burned me up too. Literally.
I think Demon of Song was my favorite.
5) Shaq is banned from tournaments.
6) In truth, it was awful. Worst shift I’ve ever done. But that’s past Lyra’s problem now.
7) Well, I need the money. And I don’t hate the job.
8) Uh huh. Not sure I’m following your current train-of-thought, but okay.
1) I’ve had to wait considerable amounts of time too, but never consistently.
Eh. I’ve heard worse.
2) I love lasagna! You’re pretty cool too, though.
3) Haha-! You’ll pay for your own drink or use a water fountain.
I know. But I guess I should look more into it. I mean, I can’t look like but so much of a dork playing Warframe. I’m pretty good at that one (mostly because it’s not hard).
4) I don’t like horror games, but it seems… like something. Like the kind of thing that you can’t take seriously, but would still probably scare the pee out of you.
We don’t have animatronics, so…
5) Lyra: Strawberry, do you come over to see me or the help?
Bon-Bon: Hey!
Tootsie: Hey! … I don’t get it.
Gotta get up super early tomorrow. I’ll try to update later when I get home.
1) Which is strange. I only saw it once. It looked kind of out of place, though. Like if you stuck one of those overly detailed pictures into real life.
2) Now that I think about it, I think you actually said that to me and I was all “What the [omitted]? That was drawn by a child!”
3) No I’m not. See? I just got two!
—
And as an added bonus!
You sure are, Bbz.
1) Ouch… That’s a long time to have to wait consistently. And if I ever need to carry a bunch of stuff, we have a wagon.
I had the first one for over a year, the second one for close to a year, and then the patch for only a month or two. Oh! Did you know asksirlintalot messaged me after I switched to the patch he drew and asked if I wanted a custom one on a larger resolution? I was so taken back! I wanted to say yes, but I already had planned to switch to the fourth one (I had already seen the sketch), so I declined.
2) Yeah, I know I’m not supposed to [omitted] swear. We had a Celestia [omitted] swear jar briefly, but I threw that mother [omitted] piece of [omitted] out the Celestia [omitted] window after the first five [omitted] minutes. Because [omitted] that [omitted] in the [omitted] [omitted]. [Omitted] it up and down and on its face!
Oh, and this just makes me think of this.
3) Tootsie: She’s so cool! She’s smart! And a princess! And she fired a huge laser! It was all Bzz-Oooom! She saved everypony with her friends! And that’s why she lives in a castle now!
4) Uh… If you say so buddy.
1) Everything is possible! I mean, Marty McFly came here once. And your world has 3d printers! Surely you can find a way!
No whining, Mr. Bbz.
2) Pretty sure Tootsie never looked up to me to begin with.
3) Pfft. Like she’d ever bother checking this thing.
4) I am! Hell is a widely accepted mythological location! Just like Hel is both a location and an individual.
5) Clever stud.
I didn’t strike a nerve at some point, did I?
1) Golly. It’s almost like you think memes are a bad thing.
2) You don’t think it’s adorable?
3) An actual avatar. Designed to be an avatar. My old avatar was a cropped panel of a comic.
4) This would all sound a lot more genuine if you were even around back when I changed from my first avatar to my second. That was a huge leap in style and tone.
5) Well, as per your requirements, I don’t have nine thousand followers. I don’t get a hundred likes on a post in two minutes (or ever). I don’t get posts on tumblr pony confessions (thank Celestia). Basically nopony knows me. And I pretty much only get fanart from, like, three ponies. Most of it from you.
But I got all the rest of those things down pat!
6) Is that not typical school-age pony behavior?
1) Ponies just hoping against hope, I guess.
Congratulations, though! I never got that far.
2) Tootsie: I like playing! And talking! And running! And jumping! And I probably ask too many questions, but I just want to know!
3) Since I have no intention of watching it, I watched a review. The guy didn’t care for it much (Caution: Strong language).
4) I sort of miss the old ponization that localization companies used to blindly enforce over here. I so wanted to headbutt that giant rat in the face with my horn.
Yes, but generally the added damage that the help provides will far outweigh the boss’s extra health.
Lyra: Well, we talked it over with her mother-
Bon-Bon: And with careful supervision-
Lyra: I’d like welcome the newest question answerer to AskLyra: Tootsie!
[Pause]
Lyra: I mean Liza!
Liza: Thank you! It’s an honor to officially join in!
Lyra: Looking at the screen though, you don’t think maybe I could just call you Tootsie on the computer, do you? Liza and Lyra look an awful-lot alike.
Tootsie?: Hmm… I’ll think about it.
1) Lyra: Well?
Bon-Bon: Eh.
Tootsie: PaAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA
2) Me neither…
1) If you’ve having the same trouble I did (after I finally figured out how to kill the adds on a melee character), it’s with its headbutt. I could never I-frame through it head-on. I found that you have to run to one side and roll perpendicular to its charge.
If it makes you feel better, you have to solo it. So you’re not at any disadvantage playing offline.
2) Outside of concept art and a toy, I’ve only seen a side view. And… he looks okay to me. Splinter always looked a little weird live-action.
You know, I’m usually pretty cynical when it comes to “negative publicity” (that 9/11 poster was completely intentional to keep media coverage up, and that’s despicable), but I didn’t make that connection. It makes perfect sense, though.
3) Okay. Enjoy!
4) Um… No? … No~… No.
Sorry, Strawberry, but B really doesn’t like much of anypony. I mean, he only really tolerates Krastos. How do you even do that? How do you not like Krastos? He’s so nice!
…
5) Scientists can’t decide if this is due to increased humidity making the air feel heavier, or cold and dry weather making the air literally heavier.
Some believe it may even be the askbox’s vertical location, relative to sea level.
[Door open]
Ribbon: Oh.
Lyra: Nice to see you too.
Ribbon: Bon-Bon isn’t here?
Lyra: Not right now.
Ribbon: Well, I’m here for Tootsie.
Lyra: I figured. She’s cleaning up some toys.
Ribbon: I see.
[Lengthy pause]
Ribbon: So… How much time have you spent with my daughter?
Lyra: Little to none.
Ribbon: … Really?
Lyra: Ask her yourself.
Ribbon: I’m… Just a little surprised, is all.
Lyra: Believe it or not, I do try to adhere to your wishes regarding Tootsie. She’s your daughter; not mine. I’m not going to disobey you just for petty revenge.
Ribbon: That’s… very admirable of you.
Lyra: I still have a sense of honor. I still try to respect the opinions of others.
Ribbon: Valuable virtues to instill in future generations… I suppose my husband was right again.
Lyra: Listen. We’ve both said some things to each other that could probably have been worded better. If you’re willing to let all of this go, so am I.
Ribbon: … I’m… sorry.
Lyra: I’m sorry too. Hug?
Ribbon: Let’s just stick to cordial conversation and go from there.
Lyra: Fair enough.
Liza: I’m ready!
Ribbon: Oh, Tootsie! It’s good to see you again. Let us be off.
Liza: Bye, Lyra!
Lyra: Have a good one, Liza!
1) I’d have probably been more impressed if I hadn’t been with another player doing all that live.
Also, no. I mean, if you ever meet me in a relaxed, casual environment, you’ll quickly find that I talk a big game. But even I know better than to cross a dragon.
Finally, buy the Jester Gloves from Magerold in Iron Keep. And get the Nahr Alma Hood and Robe by killing Titchy Gren in Undead Purgatory. There’s more than one way to get the trousers.
2) You know what I think? I think she’s jealous. I think she believes that, because I’m poor, I don’t deserve what I have.
3) … We just… sort of fell out of touch…
4) Pinkie Pie and Rainbow Dash would probably be pleased. Rarity and Rose would probably kill you.
5) Lyra: Bon-Bon says he’s some kind of executive in some kind of wine company.
Bon-Bon: Chief, Lyra. Chief Executive Officer.
Lyra: … I’m not-
Bon-Bon: He owns the corporation!
1) Near as I can tell, in a regular run, you tend to get them all in close succession, with either Duke’s Dear Freja or The Rotten being the longest stretch between any two. So far, Old Iron King was my first on NG and NG+, and Duke’s Dear Freja was my last.
Since you’re strictly offline, make sure you’re using soul boosting equipment when clearing enemies. That’ll help loads.
2) In here? Here like where? Oh well. That doesn’t sound at all foreboding. I wouldn’t worry.
3) No. Noooooowah. No. I have no intention of fighting that thing ever again. At least not without fire defense of around 900 or so.
And while impressive, he’s using the Vanquisher’s Seal from the Company of Champions. He’s actually hitting really hard.
Ribbon: You can’t be serious! You’re going to risk Tootsie winding up like… like that?!
Lyra: For the record, this is why I hate you.
Champagne: Ribbon, you love me, don’t you?
Ribbon: Ugh. Yes, but-
Champagne: Would you love me as much if our marriage had been prearranged?
Ribbon: … Uh-
Champagne: If we force Tootsie into this, she will hate it and resent us for the rest of her life. I’m confident that she will make the right decision. And that decision will be whatever she chooses. It is our place to guide her to a better future; not drag her kicking and screaming.
Ribbon: I… suppose so.
Lyra: How adult of you.
Ribbon: You are still to stay away from my daughter!
Champagne: Ah yes. Lyra. How is that bear friend of yours?
Lyra: We… actually haven’t spoken in a while…
Bon-Bon: You never told me that…
Champagne: Sorry to hear. When last we spoke I believe you were working in early education. I found that somewhat strange, considering how… crass your language can become. You must have considerable control over your lexicon.
Lyra: Well, yes. Of course.
Champagne: Be sure to exercise that control when in my daughter’s presence.
Ribbon: No!
Lyra: Sir, yessir!
Ribbon: I will not allow that wretched thing near my daughter!
Champagne: Bon-Bon, my apologies for the brevity of this visit. We should gather again soon. Perhaps during the holidays?
Bon-Bon: Certainly!
Ribbon: Are you listening to me?!
Champagne: We will take our leave for now. Well wishes.
Lyra: Have a good one!
Bon-Bon: Take care!
Ribbon: Are you ignoring me?!
Champagne: Of course not, my dear. Shall we talk about it on the way home?
[Door close]
Lyra: … Wait a minute. Wasn’t this supposed to be about Ribbon treating you better?
Bon-Bon: Let it go.
Champagne: Tootsie, have a seat.
Liza: Yes sir.
Champagne: Let me make one thing perfectly clear. Your mother and I will not support you financially forever. We couldn’t if we wanted to. And we don’t. We have meticulously plotted out your course, from education to business owner; president of a major floral production corporation. You have a very bright future ahead of you. Your mother and I have assured that.
Liza: Yes sir…
Champagne: But… None of that amounts to anything if it’s not what you want.
Liza: S-sir?
Champagne: You will not abandon the path we have set for you. Not yet. There are opportunities available now that cannot be wasted by indecision. You will continue your studies, as we have assigned, until you graduate from high school. After that, the future is yours to decide. The only thing I require is that you stand on your own four hooves. I will not have my only daughter scraping to make ends meet. Do you understand… Liza?
Liza: Yes sir! Thank you, daddy!
Champagne: I love you. Now run along and play.
Bon-Bon: … Picking out the asks for today?
Lyra: Well, I was gonna, but somepony sent me a video. I should probably watch it first. It’s a video game, so…
Bon-Bon: Right. I’ll go get a snack or something.
Lyra: Hmm… Unarmed. Must be using that ring…
Bon-Bon: Oh Celestia, he’s here!
Lyra: What? Who’s-?
Bon-Bon: Tootsie’s father!
Lyra: What?! What do we-?
Bon-Bon: Hello! Champagne! Ribbon! It’s good to see you! Welcome! Ah…
Liza: D-dad?
Champagne: Bon-Bon, I would like to speak with my daughter alone.
Bon-Bon: Of course. Lyra, come on.
Lyra: But, he can’t- This is our-
Bon-Bon: And-he-could-buy-it. Move-your-hooves.
Champagne: Dear, that includes you.
Ribbon: W-What?
Champagne: I believe you’ve already had time to speak with Tootsie.
Ribbon: I-… Alright.
[Door closes]
Lyra: … By your own husband.
Bon-Bon: Lyra!
Ribbon: You are filth.
Lyra: Get out of the way.
Ribbon: What are you-? Are you eavesdropping with your phone?
Lyra: Voice recognition program. You don’t want to see what they’re saying?
Ribbon: … Scoot over.
1) Yeah. I read that you can raise your fire defense so high that you’re immune to his breath attacks, but he’ll still kill you if he lands on you. I only won because somepony else knew the fight and locked him into the pattern while I just fired lightning arrows from a bow at a distance/stayed out of the way.
First run through I was a 40/40 dual Caestus build with enough intelligence to cast Soul Arrow as a ranged attack. I had heavy armor, a bunch of health, and just dodged everything I could.
NG+ I’m in the process of switching to some slightly lighter armor in order to have a wider range of weapons at the ready. Also I boosted my intelligence up and now use Soul Spears, which I can easily cast with my dual Blue Flames. But I only just got the four great souls so I still have a ways.
2) Maybe?
3) B: Yes, bottled liquids. That was obviously the only issue.
4) Well, we don’t want her to go. But at the same rate, something’s got to give.
5) I’m not nearly that creative. I’ve just been working on the same old same old. Don’t have anything posted about it yet, but I’m working on how the different weapons behave differently without there being a strict progression of one type being better than another.
Lyra: You lying, two-faced, disillusioned, irresponsible, ungrateful, overpriced piece of undisposable rubbish!
Ribbon: How dare you speak to me that way?! You’re-You’re nothing more than an utter waste upon civilized company!
Lyra: The most civilized company you’ve ever “embraced” was some dirty pony behind a Hoof and Hock!
Ribbon: Did you just-?!
Lyra: You bet I did!
Bon-Bon: Girls!
Ribbon: You rancid, disease-ridden vermin!
Bon-Bon: That’s enough! Ribbon, this is about you not appreciating the lengths I go through for you! And Lyra! What the heck?! I thought you were supposed to help!
Lyra: Sorry. I got carried away.
Ribbon: In a perfect world, you’d be carried away!
Lyra: What was that, you-?!
Bon-Bon: Stop it! Stop it! [Sigh] Ribbon, I’ve spent most of my life helping you. It wasn’t so long ago that you owed more money than you could afford to pay back. I know you haven’t forgotten what those days were like.
Ribbon: Of course not, Bonnie. You know I am forever grateful for your generosity. And I know it’s not just about the money, but the timing. That’s why I’ve been paying you to look after Tootsie.
Lyra: Instead of what? Expecting it to be done for free?
Ribbon: Instead of hiring a professional to work out of our home. Does she really need to be here for this?
Bon-Bon: Yes. And you shouldn’t need to hire anypony to help raise your own foal. At least not full time. She’s your responsibility. Lyra was right, you didn’t even know her age. That is not excusable.
Ribbon: I work. I study. And when I’m done I want some time to unwind. Champagne and I give Tootsie everything she could ever want. We’ve meticulously planned out every financial hurdle for her future. She will grow up to be twice as successful as I or you will ever be. I give her my all! Why should she need anything more?
Bon-Bon: Because your all is just money! She needs your time!
Ribbon: I don’t have time for time!
Lyra: Too busy sending innocent ponies to prison.
Ribbon: For your information, you uncouth peon, I am a Public Defender. I’m the one trying to keep poor ponies out of prison.
Lyra: So you’re defending criminals.
Ribbon: Insufferable! Depraved-!
Bon-Bon: Ribbon! Lyra, I swear to Celestia-!
Lyra: Alright! I’m sorry!
Bon-Bon: If you really feel that somepony should look after your child, then you need to be more appreciative. Not just throw money in my face.
Ribbon: I cared enough to go out of my way and search for somepony for you to spend your days with!
Lyra: That wasn’t for her! That was for you! You treat your own sister like an object to accessorize and boost your social standing!
Ribbon: That’s absurd!
Bon-Bon: But that’s exactly how I feel, Ribbon. You’re not helping me.
Ribbon: I’m trying to elevate you away from that… thing. She’s toxic! Even she knows it!
Bon-Bon: She’s my friend! She’s helped me more than you ever have! And she actually shows me she’s grateful!
Ribbon: I see. I’m sorry you feel that way, sister. However, this whole ordeal has proved to me just how toxic this environment is. I’m afraid Tootsie won’t be returning.
Lyra: Her name is Liza!
Ribbon: She is my daughter! I birthed her! I planned her future! And I will not hear of her referred to by such a… common name! Go fetch- Ugh, I’ll do it myself! Tootsie! Get your things we are leaving!
Liza: No!
Ribbon: Tootsie! H-how long have you-?
Liza: I listened to the whole thing! You’re not taking me away from my role model!
Ribbon: Role model? It’s you isn’t it?! You corrupted her with your ignorance! I told you to stay away from my-!
Liza: It’s Miss Cheerilee!
Ribbon: Who… Who is?
Bon-Bon: Her teacher.
Lyra: You’d know that if you were ever around.
Ribbon: Tootsie, my dear, don’t be ridiculous. What about your uncle?
Liza: I don’t want to grow flowers!
Ribbon: Bu-But your cutie mark! The flower farm! Your uncle is giving it to you when he retires! You’ll have your own flower named after you! You’ll be rich! A household name!
Liza: Miss Cheerilee says that cutie marks are open to interpretation. And that your job doesn’t have to match your cutie mark.
Ribbon: That’s preposterous!
Bon-Bon: Ribbon, your cutie mark is a bow! You’re an attorney!
Ribbon: Ah-… I… [Pause] We will discuss this at length with your father, when he has the time. For now I need you to-… [Pause] Very well. You may remain here for the moment. But don’t be surprised when your father comes around and drags you back home once he finds out. Tootsie, please behave. Bon-Bon, a good evening to you.
[Door close]
Lyra: That took a lot of guts, to stand up to your own mother.
Liza: [Sniff]
Bon-Bon: Oh, Liza. Come here. Shhh. She’ll come around.